


I'm Sorry That I Met You

by bms408



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Everyone has a potty mouth, Multi, Rin's a crybaby, Zombie Apocalypse, ex soukisu, haru talks a lot, little bits of soukisu, not much swimming, prescription drug abuse mentioned, rin's just one giant panic attack, self inflicted sexual abuse mentioned, sourin flashbacks for days, takes place in a country that isn't real, unbeta'd for the most part
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-10
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-05-19 13:50:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 35,807
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5969431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bms408/pseuds/bms408
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"We'd be much happier if we had never met them in the first place."</p>
<p> </p>
<p>This is a story in which Haru meets a man that's too good for his own safety and Rin bumps into an ex while searching for his sister. A story of new love and old love and zombies that could all end in tragedy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Rainy Day

**Author's Note:**

> This story is actually originally inspired by an rp with a friend. I decided to change a few things and formulate it into an actual fic. I couldn't tell you the last time I did a multi-chapter fic that has more than 2 chapters so bear with me.

The morning was gray with rain when Haru awoke to the unpleasant smell of burning food. Drops of water fell from the crack in the ceiling into its designated pot on the floor. The chilling draft coming through the window only made Haru’s effort to get out from under the covers more of a hassle. He knew his hot-headed roommate was downstairs burning what little food they had left, but he didn’t think it was really worth getting out bed for. The food was already burnt; there was nothing that could be done at this point.

Haru turned his attention to the alarm clock on the bedside table. It was only a little after eight in the morning, so it was odd that his roommate was already awake and moving about. Haru would have just picked to lie in bed until the rain stopped if it weren’t for a loud crash coming from below. He begrudgingly slipped out of bed and made his way downstairs to the kitchen where he was greeted with a pile of red hair and black clothing lying on the floor. The red-head looked up at Haru with bloodshot eyes most likely due to lack of sleep and/or crying.

“I thought I told you to stay away from the stove. It stinks in here.” Haru scolded.

“Shut up.” The red-head grunted as he stood up and leaned up against the counter. “I was hungry and it didn’t seem like you were going to wake up anytime soon, so I decided to make myself food.”

Haru’s roommate, Rin, was a childhood friend. They went to school together, but after they graduated high school they went their own ways. Haru went to culinary school to become a pastry chef, while Rin went straight to becoming an EMT. The two found each other again five years later, shortly after the first major outbreak of the virus. The two were both working in the city when the first major cases of the virus started showing up. The virus began to spread rapidly and people started fleeing the city by the thousands. When the two bumped into each other, they decided to find somewhere out of the city to take refuge in together. They found a beaten up, run down cabin a few miles outside of the main city and decided to live there.

That was a year ago. Now the two were making a living by sneaking into the city every few months for supplies and food. The cabin they lived in was falling apart and the city became more and more dangerous as the virus spread further out. It wasn’t uncommon for the men to get frustrated with each other and fight, verbally or physically, but in the end they always came back to each other. They knew they needed to stick together if they wanted to survive.

“Why were you on the floor?” Haru asked. He didn’t really care why Rin had crashed onto the floor, but since he came all the way down here he might as well find out.

“Am I not allowed to trip?” Rin questioned, sounding a bit irritated.

Haru took a quick glance around the room. He saw nothing that Rin could’ve just tripped over, but he didn’t really feel like starting an unneeded argument this morning. “You didn’t sleep again last night.” He stated, focusing on the dark bags underneath Rin’s eyes.

“I haven’t slept in two weeks.” Rin sighed. “It’s nothing new.”

Haru sat down at the small wooden table that was sitting a few feet away from Rin. “It’s your sister again, isn’t it?” He asked.

Rin turned his head to the side and didn’t respond. Rin had been looking for his sister, Gou, since the first major outbreaks started. Even though he knew his sister was an adult and could take care of herself, he still felt as if it’s his responsibility to keep her safe no matter what it takes. No matter how hard he tried or what method he used, he could not get in contact with his sister in any way. He searched all over the city for her, but she couldn’t be found. Since then, Rin has been determined to find his sister, whether she was dead or alive.

Shortly after Rin graduated high school, he became distant to his friends and family. He neglected and ignored his sister whenever she’d try to contact him. He knew his sister loved him very much and that she would love him no matter what he got himself mixed in to, but he still cut her from his life. Now that he didn’t know where or how she was, Rin  felt terrible. He hated himself for how he treated his little sister. The guilt was practically eating him alive. He wanted to apologize and make sure she was okay, but no matter how hard he looked, he couldn’t find her. If it weren’t for Haru, he probably would’ve been dead a long while ago.

“We need to go on a supply run soon. We’re out of almost everything.” Rin said, completely changing the subject. It was probably for the best considering Haru didn’t feel like putting up with a crying Rin all day.

“I figured as much.” Haru said. “I think it’d be best if we wait for the rain to clear out first though. At this point, we’re going to need all the visibility we can get.”

“As long as the rain doesn’t last more than two days. We can’t afford to sit around much longer.” Rin added. He averted his attention to a hole in the drywall that he had made a few months back and sighed.

“If you want, we can look for your sister again.” Haru offered. “As long as we’re in the city, it won’t be too out of our way.”

“Thanks.” Rin mumbled.

It fell silent. Haru stood up and walked over to the stove. He proceeded to start cooking some food that was actually edible. Rin shuffled past him and threw himself down onto one of the chairs at the table. Haru heard Rin let out a deep sigh.

“We’ll find her.” Haru assured.

“Okay.” Rin replied, ending their conversation.

* * *

 

The first outbreaks of the virus started about a year before Haru and Rin met each other again. The first cases had symptoms similar to malaria, except for the fact that every case was fatal. The virus was originally spread through mosquitos, which only added to the theory of it being a mutated strain of malaria. Doctors would treat patients with antimalarial drugs, yet patients were still dying. Doctor’s later found that patients were displaying symptoms of rabies as well, which could have been the reason patients were dying. The main issue was however, that mosquitos cannot transmit rabies to humans. It was also confusing to doctors that humans were displaying animalistic symptoms to rabies such as violent behavior. Doctors and scientists alike were baffled by this odd disease. As the virus started spreading further, more and more animalistic symptoms were showing up in patients. Still, every case was fatal. To prevent violent outbursts and attacks from patients, they were put into a medically induced coma until death because there was nothing that could be done to help them.

As more cases started to appear, doctors noticed a pattern. Someone who was infected either, fell extremely ill and died or they went psychotic without showing any physical symptoms until death. Although there wasn’t a scientific term for the virus, many people started calling it the Zombie Virus. The virus ate away at one’s organs and muscle tissue, and basically melted the brain of those who were infected. For those who fell extremely ill, it was common for doctors to euthanize patients before the virus spread into their brain to lessen the pain of their death. Doctor’s soon realized that patients who went psychotic didn’t have the same issues with their muscle tissue and organs as the ones who fell ill did. Their symptoms skipped straight to the melting of the brain, and yet they could still function, hence the term Zombie Virus was born.

Soon enough however, people started to develop immunity to the strain of virus spread by mosquitos. Unfortunately, the virus mutated in order to spread through other means. The virus could now be transmitted through blood and semen, much like an STD. With this mutation came a longer incubation period. Therefore, less people knew they were infected and the virus began spreading rapidly throughout the country. Hospitals became overrun with patients dying to the point where they would no longer let the infected in. Many people who found themselves infected could kill themselves before they could get any worse or spread the disease further. Others who were infected believed that scientists would find a cure and held on as long as they could before finally dying a violent death. Unless medically induced, the death was always painful.

With so many people infected, it was dangerous to walk the streets. The psychotic victims, who were nicknamed Parasites due to their ability to spread the disease, would violently attack people, whether they were infected or not. This resulted in almost everyone fleeing the cities. Even so, the virus continued to spread. Military forces were sent out in order to kill Parasites, but they could barely put a dent in the number of Parasites that were out there before they started becoming infected as well.

Since the first outbreaks started, millions of people have already died and it’s likely millions more will die as well. Scientists have proceeded to try and discover a vaccine for the virus, but with its rapid mutation to adapt to anything that’s thrown at it, they’re at a loss. Scientists predict that the human race will go extinct within the next few years at the rate the virus is spreading. The main goal for people now is to stay alive and keep the human race from going extinct, which gets harder and harder as the days go by.

* * *

 

It was around two in the afternoon when the rain finally stopped. There was only about four hours until sunset, but the men decided to go into the city anyway. The two got dressed in their jackets, boots, and masks. They grabbed their weapons, packed their first aid kit, and set off. The city was about an hour hike, meaning they had two hours allotted to spend in the city to get food and other supplies, and look for Rin’s sister. Whenever they went into the city, they usually didn’t bump into any Parasites. Most Parasites were dead at this point, but there were still some that lingered deeper in the city.

The boys made it to city line right on schedule; no setbacks as usual. They were greeted with the stomach-churning stench of decaying human bodies. Since most of the population fled, there was no real effort put into cleaning up the dead. People had a better use for their time and resources, in addition to a fear that they might get infected by the dead bodies.

They pulled their hoods up and pulled their masks over their faces, leaving only their eyes exposed. If there’s one thing they’ve learned, it’s that they need to keep their faces covered as much as possible to avoid vomiting from the stench of the city. They started their run by stocking up on as much as possible at their usual stops, but considering how much time has passed, it wasn’t surprising that there wasn’t much left that could be scavenged.

After about forty-five minutes of scavenging, the boys stopped for a moment. Rin turned to look at Haru. “I think we might need to move on. We’re not going to get enough supplies at this point.” He said.

“I’m aware of that.” Haru replied. “Do you think we have time to move further into the city? We might not have enough time to look for your sister if we do. Not to mention, we might not have enough ammo if we run into a group of Parasites.”

“I think that’s a chance we’re gonna have to take.” Rin said, sounding slightly defeated. He didn’t want to have to give up his chance to look for his sister, but it needed to be done if he wanted himself and Haru to survive. “I’m willing to give up the search for Gou this time. We need to worry about surviving first.”

Haru nodded. Haru didn’t want to push Rin into doing anything he didn’t want to do, especially when it was about his sister. In situations like this, he normally let Rin take the lead. Rin had always been a great leader, so Haru rarely worried about Rin’s judgment.

The men started making their way deeper into the city. The deeper they went, the worse the smell of decay was. A lot of Parasites had found themselves trapped deep in the city because they’re brains were so damaged they couldn’t figure out how to get out of the mazes of buildings. As a result, there were far more dead bodies deep in the city than at city line. Of course, there was also the smell of rotting food and sewage to add into the mix.

They came across a series of shops not too far from their usual stops. The shops seemed to already be cleaned out, which wasn’t a good sign. The further they went from city line, the longer it would take to get back, and with only two hours until sunset, time was an issue that could not be ignored.

“This is just great.” Rin said, getting very frustrated. He let out a long huff of air. “I still think we should just raid the hospitals. They’ll have everything we need except ammo.”

“Raiding a hospital is suicidal, dumbass.” Haru replied. “You should know that more than anyone.”

“Well, we’re kinda running out of options here, man.”

“We should just keep going. We’ll find something eventually.” Haru insisted.

“What if we get stuck out here? What are we gonna do then?” Rin questioned.

“At least it’s a better idea than raiding a hospital full of refugees and getting shot by the military.” Haru argued.

Rin sighed and took a step back to slide himself down a wall onto the ground where he hugged his knees. “What are we doing, Haru?” he sighed.

“We’re fighting about you being an idiot.” Haru answered.

“No. I mean what are we doing here? Why are we still trying to stay alive as hard as we are?” Tears started to well in Rin’s eyes as he spoke. “Is it all really worth it? Even if we do survive, what life are we going to live? Everything we ever knew is gone. There’s no such thing as humanity anymore. Even if someone finds some way of curing people, we’re not going to be able to go back to the way things were before the outbreaks.”

“Rin…”

“No!” Rin exclaimed. “All you’re going to do is tell me that things will get better; that I’ll find my sister; a whole bunch of shit I don’t want to hear anymore. I’m tired of it. I’m done.” Rin said, burying his face in his knees.

Haru shook his head. “What the fuck happened to you after graduation? The Rin I knew would never act like this; no matter how bad the going got. What the hell could have gone so wrong that you changed into a completely different person?”

“You wouldn’t understand.” Rin mumbled.

“Of course I wouldn’t understand!” Haru snapped, surprising Rin. “I wouldn’t understand because you don’t tell me anything!”

“There’s nothing to tell.”

“Bullshit! You stay up night after night crying your eyes out. You distance yourself when we start talking about personal things. Do you really expect to believe that’s all because of your sister? You got up and left everyone behind after high school; friends, family. You left everyone like they never meant anything to you.” Haru sighed. “You used to trust me with anything and everything and now you don’t tell me jack shit. You can’t expect me to understand if you don’t talk to me.”

“It’s not something I want to talk about.” Rin squeaked. He picked up his head and Haru could see that he was crying.

“Then stop being a little bitch and let’s move on. You’re twenty-three years old. Stop being a baby. We don’t have time for this shit.” Haru voice was stern and unsympathetic. If Rin wasn’t going to tell him what was wrong, he wasn’t going to play good cop.

Rin wiped his eyes and stood up. “Right.” He sniffled. “Let’s go.”

* * *

 

Finding supplies and food was becoming much harder than the boys had originally planned. Most places were either cleaned out or full of rotting food and/or bodies. Too much time had passed and the boys realized that they weren’t going to make it home before dark. Their only option now was to find somewhere to spend the night. Somewhere that they would only need to guard one or two openings. Although Parasites weren’t very active overnight, the darkness was still the most dangerous thing. Most of the city still had electricity due to wind power, but street lights weren’t maintained and started to die one by one, leaving the streets in complete darkness. The biggest problem with the darkness wasn’t the Parasites, but the non-infected people. If there were still any in the city, which there probably wasn’t, at night they would panic and kill anything that moved.

When the boys were finally able to get enough supplies, it was only a few minutes until complete darkness. They had found themselves somewhere in the middle of the city, which was about a three hour hike back to the cabin. There was no way in hell that they would make it back to the cabin in time and traveling in the dark was far too dangerous. They needed to find somewhere they could take shelter for the night, and they needed to do it fast. They came upon an old hardware store with boarded up windows and door. Chances are the place was shut down long before the outbreaks started.

“I don’t know, Rin. Something feels off about this place.” Haru said. He was skeptical of the set up of the building. The place looked too safe and convenient for comfort.

“We don’t have time for being skeptical.”

The boys slowly made their way into the building. The building smelled uncharacteristically clean for an abandoned building. After about a minute, the boys thought they were in the clear. That was, until they each felt a gun pressed up against the back of their skulls.


	2. Throwing Punches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Haru and Rin meet a beautiful angel with bright green eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time to introduce my favorite character.

“If you want to live, put your hands where we can see ‘em and get on your knees.” A voice demanded.

The boys did as they were told without question. Of everything they’ve seen; all the Parasites they’ve killed, this was by far the scariest thing they have experienced so far. Any thought Rin had of dying was completely thrown away.

“Listen man,” Rin spoke up. “We’re just two guys looking for somewhere to take shelter for the night. We’re not infected.”

“Shut it!” the first voice said.

“How do we know you ain’t infected?” a second voice added.

“Any idiot should be able to figure that out by now.” Haru mumbled. Even with a gun pointed at the back of his head, he **had** to be sarcastic. His comment resulted in a kick to his spine, making his face hit the floor. He felt a boot step on his back, pushing his chest into the floor and taking the air from his lungs.

“You wanna run that by me again, asshole?” the second voice growled.

“Guys, let them go.” A third voice could now be heard. It was too dark inside to actually see anybody, but it was easy to guess the third person was somewhere in front of them.

“Stay out of this Tachibana!” The first voice said. “They’re probably here to kill us and take our shit.”

“We were just looking for shelter.” Rin interjected. He too was then thrown onto the floor.

“They’re just as scared as we are. Just let them go.” The third voice, who they were assuming was Tachibana, argued.

The three men continued to argue. From what was being said, the boys could conclude that Tachibana was on their side. The other two voices were threatening to kill them, which brought more panic into the boys’ hearts. They knew time had passed and there was no longer any daylight. Neither Rin or Haru could see anything around them, so they were surprised when they were picked up by their arms and thrown out of the building onto the ground, followed by one of the men from inside as well.

“Since you want to protect them so much, you can fucking stay with them!” One of the voices yelled and they heard the door lock shut.

Haru was starting to get up when he realized there was an outstretched hand in front of him, offering to help him up. He grabbed the hand and immediately noticed it wasn’t Rin’s. The hand was much larger and firmer than Rin’s hands. Haru looked up, but he could only make out the man’s much larger build than Rin’s in the dim moonlight. He stood up and watched the man shuffle over to, who Haru was assuming was Rin, and help him up as well. He spoke with such a smooth manner that Haru’s heart skipped a beat.

“Are you two alright?” The man asked.

Haru couldn’t remember how to formulate a sentence. He found himself lost in this mystery man’s words. His voice was so… captivating. Haru was so lost, it took him a few moments to realize Rin snapping in his face.

“What?” Haru said, snapping out of his trance.

“Did you hit your head or something?” Rin replied.

“We should find somewhere where you can rest.” The mystery man frantically said.

“I’m fine.” Haru finally spoke up. He looked over at the larger man. It was too dark to make out any of his features except for the fact he was larger than Rin. Much larger.

“Who are you anyway?” Rin asked, beating Haru to the question. “Why are you here?”

“Oh, how rude of me.” The man replied. “I’m Tachibana Makoto. As for why I’m here, I was kinda just kicked out of the group I’ve been with since people started fleeing the city because I wanted to help you guys.”

“Why did you want to help us so bad?” Haru asked.

“I don’t know. You guys seemed just as scared as we were. I knew you two didn’t mean any harm. I couldn’t let them kill you because they were scared of their own kind.” Makoto answered.

Haru nodded and glanced around the area. There was about a six foot radius of sight before everything was swallowed by darkness. He knew they needed to find somewhere to take shelter. He was exhausted, and he knew Rin was probably ten times worse. “We need to find shelter.” He said.

“How?” Rin whined. Haru could hear the exhaustion in his voice. “It’s pitch black out.”

“Do you recommend we just stay here all night so that when those assholes wake up they can shoot us? Or do you think we should wait for a Parasite to attack us while we’re sleeping?” Haru argued.

“Hey, none of this would’ve happened if you just let me raid a hospital.” Rin scoffed.

“So everything would be just fine if I just let you get shot because you’re an idiot?” Haru retorted.

The two continued to argue for another minute before Makoto finally interjected. “Please stop.” He said. “I know somewhere we can spend the night.”

The boys stopped arguing and exchanged a skeptical look in the dark. They had no idea whether or not they could actually trust this man, but it was either trust him or die at the moment, so they followed him. He led the boys to an alleyway.

“It ends in a dead end. There’s only one way in and one way out.” Makoto said.

“It doesn’t seem very safe.” Rin pointed out.

“It’ll be fine as long as someone stands guard.” Makoto added.

“Yeah but…” Rin started, but was cut off by Haru.

“We don’t have a better option right now and you need to sleep before you die from exhaustion.” Haru said as he walked past Rin and into the alley.

“I don’t think that’s a thing, Haru.” Rin mumbled as he followed.

“I’ll stand guard.” Makoto offered.

Haru and Rin walked down the alley, leaving Makoto at the front, until they hit the dead end. The alley wasn’t long, maybe only about fifteen feet deep, so it wouldn’t be that hard to escape if Makoto wasn’t really on their side. The two sat next to each other up against a wall.

“Do you think we can trust him?” Rin whispered.

“I don’t know.” Haru replied. “Just go to sleep. We’ll deal with it when we have to.”

It didn’t take long at all for Rin to fall asleep against Haru’s shoulder. Haru on the other hand pondered over the idea that Makoto’s actions weren’t as good as they seemed. He didn’t understand why he would worry about two strangers’ lives before his own, especially at a time like this. No one short of an angel would have such a valiant mindset in their current situation. Haru couldn’t even be sure that he was still out there. For all he knew, Makoto could have led him and Rin into the alley and then ran away. It wasn’t like he could see the opening to the alley.

Haru tried to calm his nerves by focusing on Rin’s steady, gentle breathing. At least he knew that no matter what would happen, Rin would be by his side. With that thought in mind, he slowly drifted to sleep.

* * *

The faint orange glow of the sunrise woke Haru up the next morning. The first thing he noticed was that he and Rin were still alive. Rin was no longer on his shoulder however, but rather a mass of black clothing on the ground. Haru looked ahead at the opening of the alley and saw a man, who he was assuming(or rather hoping) was Makoto, leaning against a wall. He stood up and slowly made his way toward the man.

The man turned around when Haru was about three feet from him. “You’re awake.” He said, his voice confirming that he was in fact Makoto.

Now that there was sunlight, Haru could make out all of Makoto’s features. His greenish brown hair that fell in a ruffled mess over his forehead; His tan skin and green eyes that Haru could stare at forever; His broad shoulders and wide chest due to a heavily toned body; His strong arms and legs, and an ass that looked just so squeezable…

_What?_

Haru heard Makoto say something, but couldn’t make out what it was. “What?” he asked.

“I asked you about how you slept last night.” Makoto said with a smile.

“I guess I slept as good as anyone who slept sitting up against a brick wall in the cold.” Haru replied.

“I take it your friend is still sleeping?” Makoto asked.

“Yeah.”

“You know, I don’t think I ever caught your name. I told you mine. I think it’s only fair that I know yours.”

“Haruka, but just call me Haru. And the idiot back there is Rin.” Haru said while motioning over to Rin.

“Oh yeah, about him.” Makoto started. “He seemed a bit… skittish last night. Is that how he always is or…?”

“He’s delicate. He hasn’t been himself in days. He’s normally not like that.” Haru stated. “Normally he’s a jackass.”

“You two seem close. Are you and him like… a thing?”

“Ew, no.” Haru rejected. “We’re just old friends.”

“I’m sorry for assuming. I-I didn’t mean to imply that you swing the other way or anything, not that that would be a bad thing if you did, but I was just curious and wanted to get to know you better and…” Makoto rambled.

“It’s fine. I’m not offended or anything.” Haru said. “But I think you owe me some answers.”

“Answers to what?” Makoto questioned.

“Who exactly are you?”

“I don’t quite understand what you’re asking.”

“Who are you?” Haru repeated. “Why did you save us? Why did you protect us? Why are you still here? Who in their right mind would threaten their own life for a couple of strangers?”

“I just wanted to help.”

“But why exactly? What are you looking to gain?”

“I’m not looking to gain anything.” Makoto said defensively. He let out a long sigh. “Look, things are pretty shitty right now. There’s so much out there that can kill you, so why die by the hands of another man. You two are just like me. Scared, but pulling through, but unlike me you two must have some reason to still be alive. To still be fighting for yourselves.” He paused for a moment. “I admire that. I didn’t want your chances of reaching your goals fucked over by a group of shitty people. Is that so wrong?”

There was a long, awkward silence between the two men. Haru normally liked silence, but he wasn’t too fond of this one.

“Where are you gonna go when we leave?” Haru finally asked, breaking the brutal silence.

Makoto shrugged.

Haru sighed and looked down at his feet. _Why was he suddenly feeling so bashful?_ “Do you wanna maybe, come back with me and Rin?”

“I.I couldn’t. I wouldn’t want to be a nuisance to you two.”

“It’s fine.” Haru insisted. “As long as you’re willing to pull your own weight.” Haru let a small smile stretch across his lips with the words.

“That won’t be a problem.” Makoto replied with a smile.

The two made eye contact for a quick moment, filling Haru’s stomach with butterflies. Their brief moment was interrupted by a loud groan coming from behind them. They both turned around expecting to see a Parasite, but instead it was just Rin(to their relief), groaning at the sunlight like the vampire he is.

* * *

Shortly after Rin woke up and the situation with Makoto was explained and agreed to, the group set out to the cabin. They needed to grab extra food and supplies due to their new third member, but that wasn’t much of a setback. Within the next few hours they made it home to the busted up cabin. The place was exactly like they had left it, meaning it wasn’t found or raided during their extended absence.

Once they were inside, they started putting away their food and supplies and showed Makoto to his room. Luckily for them the cabin had three bedrooms, or at least in their case, three beds that could be moved to other rooms that could become bedrooms. After everything was settled in, the three stood in the kitchen and discussed what their next move should be.

“I think our next move should be moving back into the city.” Haru stated.

“Are you crazy?” Rin rejected. “What about the Parasites?”

“The population of Parasites in the city is low.” Makoto added to the conversation. “Most of them are dead. Usually the ones that show up are recently infected.”

“See.” Haru said.

“But Parasites aren’t the main threat in the city. It’s the people.” Makoto quickly added on. “There are still several groups of people within the city, and let me tell you, they are not pleasant in the slightest.”

“Then what do you two suggest we do?” Haru questioned.

“I think we should just stay put.” Rin said. “We’re not in much danger here, so why try to put ourselves in more danger.”

“I kinda have to agree with Rin in this case.” Makoto said. “Looking at our current position, it seems like the best option.”

“That would work, but only if Iwatobi’s resources weren’t running out as we speak.” Haru countered.

“We could always try other cities.” Makoto offered. “Samezuka isn’t too far from Iwatobi. The infection is generally new there. We’ll probably need to kill some Parasites, but they should still be pretty stocked up.”

Rin froze when he heard the name.

“That could actually work.” Haru admitted. “We would just need to allot ourselves extra time to get there and back.”

“Not necessarily.” Makoto said. “Samezuka had plenty of motels that could easily be broken in to.”

“Wait!” Rin interrupted. “Why would we waste our time on a city like Samezuka? That place was shitty before the infection. I bet it’s even worse there now.”

“All the more reason to go. The infection probably spread really quick there. Most people are probably dead by now.” Haru said.

“I really don’t think we should get mixed up with people from Samezuka. They’re probably ten times worse than the other guys we ran in to earlier. Please, we should just avoid it.” Rin almost pleaded.

“Just suck it up.” Haru growled. “I don’t know why you want to avoid Samezuka so bad, but you need to fucking deal. I’m tired of your bullshit, Rin.”

“ **My** bullshit?” Rin repeated. “What about you? Taking advice from some guy you just met; and why? Because he saved your life? Are you some kind a pansy-ass princess that can’t take care of himself anymore?”

Rin’s comment made Haru furious. He was fed up with Rin’s rotten attitude. He lunged forward and decked Rin in the side of his face. Of course, Rin responded by hitting Haru back. The two proceeded to violently attack each other until they were almost bloody. Normally when they physically fought, they would eventually give up due to exhaustion, but that didn’t seem like the case this time.

Makoto tried pulling the two apart, but his attempts were futile. He worried that the two were going to kill each other. He had never seen two men that were supposedly friends fight so violently. It took him almost five minutes to finally break them up; grabbing Haru’s arms and holding him against his chest, and pinning Rin to the floor with his foot. When Makoto finally believed they had cooled down a bit, he released them. Rin stormed out of the kitchen and up the stairs while Haru stormed out the back door, leaving Makoto standing alone in the kitchen.

* * *

Haru stood outside, letting the cold air brush over his face. It was right in-between winter and spring meaning the air still had some bite to it. He let the crisp air wash over his body, mainly due to the fact that he didn’t bring his jacket out with him. He needed to cool down anyway. He sighed as he ran his hands over his skin, knowing that Rin had left marks in their brawl. In all the times they had fought, they never got as violent as they did today. As much as Haru wanted to blame Rin completely, he couldn’t. He knew his attitude was just as bad as Rin’s right now. He knew they were both extremely irritable and tired of each other’s shit. Maybe having Makoto around will fix things, even if it is just a little. Maybe Makoto could calm both of them down a bit, just as long as Rin doesn’t try to touch Makoto or anything like that. Just the thought of that made Haru angry.

_Wait, why was he getting angry over something that didn’t even happen?_

Haru heard the screen door open behind him. He turned his head expecting to see Rin, but was pleasantly (for some odd reason) surprised to see Makoto.

“You should really have a jacket.” He said, offering Haru a jacket. “It’s cold out. You could get sick.”

Haru graciously took the jacket and slipped it on. He had to admit, he was a little relieved to have the jacket because he was starting to get quite chilly.

“Are you alright?” Makoto asked, standing beside Haru.

Haru shrugged. He glanced over at Makoto and noticed the darkened skin on his arms and face. Guilt washed over his conscious. He didn’t take into consideration that Makoto would get hurt during his fight with Rin.

“What about you? Are you okay?” he asked.

Makoto look a little shocked at being asked the question. Haru noticed a slight pink tint on his cheeks. “Y-Yeah.” He stuttered.

It fell silent. Haru stared ahead at the empty field behind the cabin that stretched for miles. At the other end of the field was Samezuka. Just walking to the city would take an entire day alone. Samezuka was known for its bad reputation. The downtown area was full of not-so-great colleges and tech schools, but the smaller neighborhoods within the city are full of gambling, prostitution, and drugs and alcohol. Of course, many college students got involved in things they should not have got involved with, which is why the colleges aren’t that great. It was easy to be pushed down the wrong path in Samezuka, but that didn’t explain Rin’s attitude toward the city.

Haru looked over to Makoto again. It was as if he could read the question on the taller male’s mind, ‘ _Is it always like this?_ ’

“We’re not usually like this.” Haru answered the unasked question.

“Was this the first time you two fought?” Makoto asked.

“We fight all the time.”

“Even physically?”

“Not normally that violent, but yeah.” Haru admitted. “I don’t know what happened. I guess we’re just tired of each other.” He let out a defeated chuckle.

“I’m sure you two will work things out.” Makoto assured.

“I know.” Haru sighed. “We always do… Even when he doesn’t deserve it.”

There was a long pause before Makoto spoke. “You should talk to him.” He said.

“I know.” Haru agreed. He paused for a brief moment. “But I won’t.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I know these first few chapters seem rushed, but I'm super impatient and just can't wait for the good stuff to start. The fun will start soon enough, so bear with me.


	3. Samezuka

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys venture into Samezuka and get an unwanted surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say in advanced that the 'h' key on my keyboard is broken and doesn't always work and I don't always catch myself, so I'm sorry for any dumb mistakes like that.
> 
> Also, get ready for some Rin perspective.

A week had passed since Haru and Rin had their fight. Like Haru had told Makoto, he never spoke to Rin about what was going on or how he was feeling. He felt Rin didn’t deserve an explanation or apology for his actions. He felt a tinge of pleasure leaving Rin in the dark for once. But even though he and Rin hadn’t talked about the issue, tensions between the two did die down a bit. Haru couldn’t tell whether it was from the violent, physical fight or the fact that they had Makoto around to vent to now. Either way, Haru liked the way things were at the moment. Things were calm.

There was only one thing that really bothered Haru however; it was the amount of time Rin was spending with Makoto. He would get so unreasonably jealous when the two slip in to a room and “talk”. He didn’t think it was fair that Rin got to spend so much time with Makoto. He didn’t know why, and that made it bother him even more.

Makoto had settled in quite well with Rin and Haru. They learned that Makoto really was just a kind hearted man who just wanted to help everyone. He was most definitely a goodie-goodie. He had just graduated from college when the major outbreaks started. He was a hard working student that aimed for good grades, yet held a strong C average. In his spare time, he’d volunteer at animal shelters. He wouldn’t tell them much about his family other than the fact that he had two twin siblings; a brother and a sister. Overall, he was very appealing to both Haru and Rin. They enjoyed having him around.

* * *

Makoto and Haru were sitting out on the back patio watching the sun set behind the hills. They both knew that soon enough they’d need to venture over those hills and in to Samezuka, but they decided to push those thoughts behind them for now. Right now, they just wanted to bask in the little serenity they had.

“It sure is beautiful.” Makoto said. “Well, considering the world is ending and all.”

Haru let out a little laugh. He sighed peacefully. “Rin’s sister would love this. She always loved watching the sun set.”

“Were you and Rin’s sister close too?” Makoto asked.

“I guess you could say that. She used to always hang around me and Rin when I’d visit, although she did always favor her brother. Those two always had such a great bond. That’s what made Rin’s sudden disappearance even harder. It wasn’t like him to just leave his sister behind.” Haru answered. “But I guess that’s just a sibling thing. I wouldn’t know. I’m an only child.”

“I know how it feels to be idolized by your sibling.” Makoto sighed.

Haru could practically feel the air tense. “Sensitive subject, huh?”

Makoto nodded.

“What happened with your siblings?” Haru asked.

Makoto sighed again. “Let’s just say I haven’t had a good relationship with my family in years.” His expression gave away his nervousness.

“Relax, man.” Haru said. “I’m not gonna make you spill the beans.” Haru watched as Makoto’s shoulders visually untensed.

They sat in silence, just watching the sky change color. Haru felt a sense of ease. Although he felt at ease around Rin most of the time, the sense of ease he felt around Makoto was much deeper. He felt he could pour himself out completely to Makoto and he wouldn’t even bat an eye. Even though Makoto was basically a stranger, he felt safe around him.

“You know,” Makoto said, breaking the silence. “Rin says he regrets leaving you and his sister behind.”

Haru was thrown off a little because the statement just seemed random to him. “What?” he asked.

“Rin’s been telling me he feels bad about leaving you two behind. He blames himself for his sister and your _attitude_.” Makoto said. “His words, not mine.” He added in defense.

“If he really felt bad, he’d tell me himself.”

Makoto shrugged with a pout. “I’m just playing messenger boy.” He said. “But, I do think you should be a little lighter on him. I mean, you two are like best friends right? So what if he made a few mistakes? Everyone does at some point in their life.”

“It’s not the fact that he’s made mistakes that makes me upset with him. It’s the fact that he won’t talk to me about them. He just leaves me in the dark.” Haru replied.

“I’m sure he has his reasons.”

“Why don’t we stop talking about Rin?” Haru scoffed. “Let’s talk about you instead.”

“Why me?” Makoto asked, a little shocked at the idea.

“You are some stranger that’s been living with me for a week. It would be nice to know about you a bit.”

“There’s not really anything to know” Makoto lied.

“That’s bullshit.” Haru bluntly said. “You had a life before the virus.”

“That’s not a subject I want to talk about.” Makoto said.

Haru sighed. “I figured as much.”

* * *

The dark sky that was painted with stars could be seen through the window. One advantage of living outside the city was that the night sky was always so clear and beautiful. Practically every star could be seen and the moon lit the outside.

Rin sighed, knowing that he was going to spend another night awake. Sometimes he really wished he could talk to Haru or Makoto about it, but he never had the strength to. He already knew Haru hated him for leaving (and he’s probably convinced Makoto to hate him too), but if Haru found out why he left everyone behind he might kill him. That’s why he always tells Haru it’s just his sister. Granted, parts of his issues are from his sister, but there’s a much bigger source of his problems that he won’t tell anyone about.

Rin hated himself for leaving everyone behind. He feels like an idiot for leaving in the first place. If he had just stayed home with Haru like he had originally planned he would have never fucked up his life like he did. He had plans for his future; plans that he just threw away.

Rin turned his attention to the door leading to the hallway. All he had to do was walk out that door and he could have someone to talk to. He knew talking to Makoto would be a thousand times easier, but he felt that would be unfair to Haru. Haru deserved to know what happened, but Rin couldn’t bring himself to tell him the truth. He knew that Haru would hate him even more than he already does if he knew.

Rin decided to go out and get some air. He stepped out the back door on to the patio and was startled when he saw another person on the patio. It took him a few moments to realize that it was only Makoto. “What are you doing out here?” Rin asked.

Makoto turned around just as startled as Rin was. “I.I didn’t hear you come out.” He said.

“You didn’t answer my question.” Rin stated.

“Well, guilt’s a killer cause of insomnia.” Makoto said with a nervous laugh.

“Guilt? What could you feel guilty about?” Rin questioned. Just like Haru, Rin also believed Makoto was some kind of saint.

“Probably the same shit as you.” Makoto answered. “My past. Issues that I don’t think I could tell anyone. Decisions I’ve made that have changed who I am.”

“So you know.” Rin said. It made him a little uneasy that Makoto knew about his issues with his past.

“It wasn’t that hard to figure out, but I knew you wouldn’t want to talk about it. So, as long as you don’t ask about my past, I won’t ask about yours.”

Silence washed over the patio. All that could be heard was the sounds of the bugs and bird that called in the night. It was a chilly night and Rin regretted not wearing a heavier jacket outside. He noticed that Makoto must have been cold too given the fact that he kept rubbing his hands together.

Rin cleared his throat. “I was gonna go inside and make some tea. Want some? It’ll warm you up.” He offered.

“Yeah.” Makoto answered. “Thanks.”

In the kitchen Makoto sat at the small wooden table while Rin put water on to boil. Rin reached into the overhead cabinet and pulled out the tea bags and a pair of mugs. With his back turned to Makoto he sighed. “You know…” he started. “Haru really likes you… he likes you a lot more than he likes me anymore.”

“W.what?” Makoto said with his face flushed. “Don’t be ridiculous. That can’t be true.”

“But it is.”

“How can you tell?” Makoto asked.

“You make him happy.” Rin said. “I’ve known Haru forever. Even though he doesn’t express it, I can tell he’s happy around you.”

“Haru still cares about you Rin. He’s told me. He’s just upset that you left. I bet if you talked to him about it, he’d understand.” Makoto encouraged.

“I doubt it. If he found out why I left in the first place he’d probably never talk to me again.” Rin admitted. “I hate myself for doing it, so he wouldn’t be any different.”

“What you did couldn’t have been that bad.” Makoto insisted.

“It’s not that what I did was bad.” Rin said. “What I did was stupid. I can’t even forgive myself for it.”

“Don’t be so hard on yourself.” Makoto said. “Everyone does stupid things.” Makoto had this expression that made Rin question whether Makoto knew about Rin’s situation or not, but before he could comment the tea kettle started whistling.

* * *

After much arguing and attempts to compromise, Haru and Makoto had finally convinced Rin to go in to Samezuka with them. Instead of making the traitorous hike from the cabin to Samezuka, they decided to first go in to Iwatobi again and steal a car. Luckily for them, Makoto knew how to hotwire a car. Driving to Samezuka saved them hours of time.

Their trip to Samezuka wasn’t for supplies or anything, but rather just a visit to see what the conditions of the city were. Samezuka wasn’t in a great condition before the outbreaks, but compared to the conditions now, the old Samezuka was beautiful. Now the city looked like a war zone. Buildings were falling apart and there was debris everywhere, but to their relief, there were nowhere near as many dead bodies in the streets as there was in Iwatobi. Instead of the place smelling like rotting flesh, like in Iwatobi, Samezuka smelled heavily of gasoline and ammonia.

They drove through the city slowly, keeping an eye at every angle. They could never know when someone would run out in to the street. They couldn’t risk hitting a healthy person or having a Parasite smash through their windows. After driving in Samezuka for about half an hour, Makoto stopped the car in a spot that seemed to be safe and they got out. They unpacked their weapons and properly covered themselves (before leaving the cabin, Haru and Rin made sure to teach Makoto how to properly dress for this kind of thing). They wondered around the streets not necessarily looking for anything in particular; they just figured if they found something they thought they might need, they’d grab it. They were each making mental maps of the area, remembering specific landmarks and such that might help them later.

It was obvious to see that Rin was uncomfortable. Haru and Makoto had just shrugged it off figuring that he was just scared, but that wasn’t the case. Sure, he was scared of the Parasites and what they could do, but that was no more than Haru and Makoto. No, why Rin was so uncomfortable had to do with what the city meant to him. A few months after he graduated high school, Rin left Iwatobi behind without telling anyone where he was going. Samezuka was where he went.

Rin’s original plans for after high school had him staying in Iwatobi with Haru, training to make it to the Olympics for swimming. Haru and he used to swim together growing up. They were both great swimmers, but the difference was Rin wanted to do it competitively while Haru just did it because it made him feel _“free”_. Unfortunately, Rin made a poor decision and instead found himself in Samezuka at a community college. After only a few months of school, Rin dropped out and threw out the idea of the making it to the Olympics and swimming all together. Rin instead went in to emergency medical treatment training and six months later became an EMT. He figured if he couldn’t achieve his dream anymore, he’d at least save other people’s lives. He worked at a hospital in Samezuka for a little over a year before deciding to come back to Iwatobi. While working in Iwatobi, he started taking the training and courses he needed in order to become a paramedic, but didn’t get a chance to finish before the major outbreaks started.

Everything Rin had worked for in high school he just threw away and he hated himself for it. All because he got distracted, no, captivated by someone who was nothing more than a stranger at the time. He let his emotions get the best of him. His heart acted before his brain could think. He found himself lost in teal eyes and a shit-eating grin. It made him feel like one of the dumb teenage girls from the television shows Gou would make him and Haru watch with her.

Rin sighed, knowing that said person with teal eyes was most likely still in Samezuka. He vowed to never come back to the city, yet here he was, aimlessly walking through a neighborhood he knew all too well. What an unfortunate coincidence it was that they decided to stop here. He walked behind Makoto and Haru in an attempt to keep himself hidden in case they bumped in to someone Rin didn’t want to see.

Too busy looking at the pebbles on the street as he walked, Rin bumped in to Makoto’s back when they stopped walking. Makoto turned his head to shush Rin. He looked over Makoto’s shoulder and saw a large group of people about half a block away.

“Are they Parasites?” Rin asked, his voice nothing more than a whisper.

“I don’t know.” Makoto replied, his voice just as hushed.

The group was too far away for them to make out any physical characteristics that would confirm whether they were Parasites or not.

“We should get closer.” Haru said.

“Are you crazy?” Rin quietly exclaimed.

“It’s the only way to find out if they’re Parasites.” Haru argued.

“I don’t care whether they’re Parasites or not. I don’t want to have contact with even if they aren’t infected.” Rin said

“Let’s just turn around and go in another direction. There’s no reason to get involved with them right now anyway.” Makoto said, trying to keep the peace.

The three turned around and started heading back in the direction they came from. When they turned the corner they stopped dead in their tracks upon seeing a group of Parasites coming towards them. There were a dozen of them coming right at the men. Instead of fighting the group, the men decided to try and get away from them. As their luck would have it, no matter what direction they tried to escape they found themselves cornered by Parasites.

“Why are they grouped up like this?” Rin questioned. He had never seen Parasites travel in groups.

“I have no idea.” Makoto answered. “They’re not like this in Iwatobi.”

“We’ll just have to end their suffering.” Haru said.

The boys readied their weapons as the Parasites drew closer. Some of them went straight towards the men, but most were attacking other Parasites. A Parasite’s only goal was to attack. Parasites attacked any and everything they could. They were still human and that was obvious. Most Parasites looked alike. They were pale and thin to the bone, and their hair fell out in chunks. Most didn’t have teeth or tongues anymore. Some also walked around with open wounds that would have killed them if it weren’t for their enhanced clotting abilities. Some wounds were as bad as missing limbs. Even with their clotting ability however, they could still be taken out anyway a non-infected person could as long as the blow was deep and hard enough.

The boys fought, trying to leave some kind of dent in the numbers, but couldn’t. To them, it seemed that the Parasites were never ending. They were struggling to protect themselves and each other. They had managed to make their way out of the circle they were trapped in, but they still needed a way out and away from all the Parasites.

Just when they thought all hope was lost and they were dead, they heard a loud and deep voice call, “TAKE COVER!” followed by a clang of metal. Before any of them could react, there was a loud explosion that tore through the Parasites and separated the group.

Rin found himself being dragged in to an alley way and up a fire escape. “Who the fuck?” he tried to question. He was ignored as the stranger continued to drag Rin to the rooftop of the building. Once the initial shock of the explosion had worn off, Rin went in to a complete panic. “Let go of me!” He protested. He started thrashing and kicking the stranger.

“Rin calm down.” The man said.

“How do you know my name?” Rin asked. “Who the hell are you?” Rin knew that it wasn’t Haru or Makoto, the voice was too deep. “Where are Haru and Makoto? Why’d you blow us up?” Rin continued to fight back, punching and kicking the man in any way he could.

“Rin…” The man said, his voice soft and gentle.

Rin stopped. That voice sounded so damn familiar, but he couldn’t place it.

The man pulled down his hood to reveal cropped black hair. He pulled down his mask to reveal a gentle smile. Finally he pulled off his goggles to expose his bright teal eyes which gave Rin his answer. “It’s me.”

“S.Sousuke..?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look who's here
> 
> Come yell with me on tumblr or twitter @bms408


	4. Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin is weak. He can't handle the stress. He falls apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a little longer to write than expected. Whoops.
> 
> We finally have some Sourin

_“Why won’t you just admit it?” A furious Rin argued. “You’re an addict.”_

_“Rin I’m in pain. Just give me the bottle.” Sousuke pleaded to his enraged boyfriend._

_“You don’t need it.” Rin insisted._

_“Yes I do.”_

_Rin’s grip on the orange prescription bottle tightened when Sousuke reached out to take it from him. “I’m not enabling you anymore.” He said with tears welling in his eyes._

_Sousuke grabbed Rin’s wrists and backed him in to the wall with anger painted on his features. “Give me the pills, Rin.” He said. He was trying to keep his voice calm, but Rin could tell he was furious and about to snap._

_Rin winced when Sousuke’s grip on his wrists tightened. “Let go of me!” he rejected._

_“Give me the pills!”_

_“NO!”_

_Sousuke raised his fist as if he was going to hit Rin, but quickly brought it to his side when he realized what he was about to do. Seeing Rin’s horrified expression, he let go of Rin’s wrist that he was still holding on to. “Rin…” he started with guilt in his voice “I’m sorry… I. I don’t know what came over me…”_

_Rin was silent. He dropped his head and shoulders as tears started rolling down his cheeks. “Take your fucking pills!” he suddenly exclaimed. He threw the orange bottle down at Sousuke’s feet. “It’s over! I never want to see you again you no good son of a bitch!” he yelled. He stormed out the door, slamming it behind him, leaving Sousuke alone in their shared apartment._

* * *

Rin frantically paced back and forth biting his knuckles. He should be thrilled that his life was just saved, but he wasn’t. Instead, he was confused, upset, nervous, but most of all, angry. The last thing he wanted to do was see Sousuke, and to make things even worse, he had no idea what happened to Haru and Makoto. They could be dead, or worse being attacked by Parasites. Of course Sousuke had to show up and blow up his friends. He couldn’t have just died and made Rin’s life easier.

Rin heard Sousuke call his name, but he chose to ignore him. He was furious. He wanted to scream; he wanted to cry; he wanted to just kill Sousuke right there, but at the same time he wanted to throw himself in to Sousuke’s arms and kiss him.

Sousuke continued to call Rin’s name and Rin continued to ignore him. He had dreamed of seeing Sousuke again, but he never imagined it would actually happen. He hated Sousuke after they broke up, but he couldn’t stop himself from thinking about him. He had spent so many nights lying awake and wondering what Sousuke was up to and if he was feeling the same way he was. He questioned why he broke up with Sousuke in the first place and would get outrageously jealous of the imaginary men and women in his mind that could possibly be dating Sousuke. He felt a slight sense of comfort knowing that Sousuke still recognized  and cared about him.

Rin sighed. “Why?” he asked.

“Why what?” Sousuke replied.

“Why are you here?” Rin added to his initial question.

“I could be asking you the same thing. At least I live here.”

“Why did you blow me up?”

“I didn’t blow **you** up.” Sousuke corrected.

“Quit being cocky.” Rin growled.

“Hey, I just saved your ass. A little ‘thank you’ would be nice.”

“But why did you do it?” Rin asked a second time.

“Because it was you, Rin.” Sousuke finally answered. “No matter how hard I’ve tried, I couldn’t forget your face. When I saw you fighting against those… things, I started to panic. I couldn’t believe it was actually you.”

“Cut the sappy shit!” Rin exclaimed. “What are your real intentions with me?”

Sousuke let out a defeated chuckle. “You really don’t trust me at all.” He said, looking up at Rin. He could see Rin was shaking and he was hoping it was from the cold and not his anger. “You were gonna die out there.”

“So you thought the best thing to do was to blow up me and my friends?” Rin questioned.

“You’re alive aren’t you?” Sousuke countered.

“But my friends might not be!” Rin yelled as he started pacing back and forth again.

Sousuke stood up and walked over to Rin, making him stop his pacing. He reached out his hand to grab Rin’s shoulder, but had it smacked away.

“Don’t fucking touch me.” Rin said. His voice was soft and he sounded as if he was about to burst in to tears; and in reality, he probably was.

Sousuke took a step back away from Rin and sighed. “I’m sorry, Rin.” He said. “For everything.”

Rin said nothing. He finally took a moment to properly look at Sousuke’s face. His eyes were darker and looked so, so tired. The dark scruff on his face told Rin he hadn’t shaved in a few days. His hair was darker and thinner. He had gained a significant amount of muscle mass since the last time Rin saw him. Overall, he just looked older; way older than a twenty-three year old should look.

After a long silence, Rin finally replied, “You should have been sorry three years ago.”

Sousuke was thrown aback at Rin’s reply. He even seemed a little angry and offended. “I was sorry three years ago.” He stated.

“Yeah, well, you have a really funny way of showing it.” Rin said with a low voice.

“What did you want? A thesis paper?” Sousuke argued. “After we broke up, you refused to talk to me. You waited until I was working to get your shit and then you were gone. I didn’t hear another word from you.” Sousuke sighed. “I thought I’d never see you again, Rin.”

Rin felt a fluttering in his chest that he hadn’t felt since he first started dating Sousuke, but he quickly pushed the feeling back. “That was the plan.” He mumbled.

“Of course it was.”

* * *

The force of the explosion threw Haru to the side; his back crashing down to the concrete. The next thing he knew, Makoto was over top of him with his arms next to his head propping himself up. Haru absentmindedly wrapped his arms tightly around Makoto’s back as debris flew past them. After the ground settled and the ringing in his ears subsided, Haru realized how tightly he was holding on to Makoto and quickly released himself.

“Haru, are you okay?” Makoto asked, his voice full of concern.

“I. I’m fine.” Haru said. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” Makoto said as he stood. Haru noticed that there didn’t seem to be any serious injuries on Makoto, maybe just a few small cuts and bruises from debris.

Makoto reached his hand out to help Haru up, which Haru graciously accepted. As quickly as he pulled himself up, Haru found himself falling forward. Makoto’s reflexes were quick and Haru fell in to Makoto’s arms, his face resting on Makoto’s hard chest. Haru felt his blood rush straight to his face.

“You must have hit your head when you fell.” Makoto stated as he helped Haru stand again.

“I’m fine.” Haru insisted. “Really.”

Makoto gave Haru a pout that melted his heart (although, he’d never admit it out loud). “At least let’s find a place to rest for the time being.” Haru nodded in reply. “And let me help you walk.” Makoto added.

“Now you’re taking it too far.” Haru said, displeased.

“I don’t want you to over exert yourself. You might have a concussion.” Makoto said.

“What are you gonna do? Carry me?” Haru asked with a very sarcastic tone.

“I can.” Makoto stated. Before Haru had time to respond, he was lifted off the ground princess style. “What are you doing?” he exclaimed.

“I said I’d carry you.” Makoto replied as if it was a straight forward answer.

All of Haru’s blood filled his cheeks. “Fine, you can help me walk. Now put me down before you hurt yourself.” He stuttered.

Makoto put Haru’s feet back and the ground with and accomplished grin. “Thank you.” He said. “And, I wouldn’t have hurt myself; you’re not heavy at all.” He added with a cheesy grin.

Haru walked beside Makoto, occasionally gripping his arm when he felt a fit of dizziness wash over him. Makoto babied Haru and made him stop and rest for a few minutes on multiple occasions. Generally speaking, it was very annoying to Haru, but in a way he was flattered that Makoto cared that much about him.

The men searched around for Rin or somewhere they could spend the night. It would be dark soon and they definitely could not spend the night outside like they could at Iwatobi; Samezuka was a completely different ball game. Haru hoped that since they couldn’t find Rin (dead or alive), he had found a place to take shelter in. Rin should have been smart enough to do that on his own. Rin knew how to take care of himself. Even so, Haru was worried about Rin.

After roaming around for another half an hour, the two finally found a motel that wasn’t surrounded by Parasites. It was easy for Makoto to pick a lock and get them a room for the night. When Makoto pushed open the door, Haru immediately noticed how cozy, or small for a more accurate description, the room was. There was only one bed, a table and a matching pair of chairs, a microwave on top of a chipped granite countertop, a sink, and a dresser with three of the four drawers missing. The room smelled heavily like old cigarette smoke and rainwater. The dust and dirt on every surface told them the place hadn’t been cleaned in a long time.

Makoto walked over to the bed and tried to clean the covers as much as possible, stirring up all the dust. After the dust resettled on the floor, Makoto looked over to Haru. “Here.” He said. “You should rest.”

“I told you I’m fine.” Haru insisted.

Makoto gave Haru the mom’s _‘come on’_ face. “Haru.” He said, his tone even sounding like a mom.

Haru sighed and sat on the bed. “Happy now, mother?”

Makoto smiled and nodded. He took Haru’s bag and went to put it on the little wooden table when Haru noticed the blood soaking through Makoto’s jean on his thigh. “Your leg.” Haru pointed out.

“My leg?” Makoto questioned. He looked down at his leg and only then noticed the blood on his jeans.

“How did you not notice that?” Haru asked, asking himself just as much as he was asking Makoto. “Doesn’t it hurt?”

“Not really.” Makoto admitted. “I guess I was too busy being worried about you to notice it.”

Haru stood up and walked over to Makoto. “Take off your pants.” He demanded.

“What?” Makoto exclaimed as his cheeks burned bright red.

“We need to stop the bleeding. Don’t you feel light headed or anything?” Haru added to his original comment.

“Now that you mention it, maybe a little.” Makoto said. “But do I really need to take my pants off?”

Haru didn’t need to say anything for Makoto to know his answer. Makoto hesitantly pulled off his jeans, revealing a shard of glass sticking out of his thigh. Haru made Makoto sit in one of the wooden chairs at the table. He grabbed the first aid kit out of his bag and kneeled down on the floor to get a better look at Makoto’s wound. The shard wasn’t in very deep and the injury itself wasn’t bleeding too bad. Makoto’s jeans rubbing against the glass must have kept the blood flowing. “This might hurt a bit.” Haru warned as he pinched the glass with two fingers. He heard Makoto take in a sharp breath of air through his teeth when he pulled the glass shard out of his leg. Without missing a beat, Haru quickly bandaged his leg tightly to stop the blood flow. “There.” He said as he stood up.

“Thank you, Haru.” Makoto said. He glanced over to the window and noticed how dark it had gotten. Luckily for them the electricity was still working on back-up generators. “I think we should get some sleep. We’ll look for Rin in the morning.” Haru nodded in response. “You can have the bed. I’ll sleep on the floor.” Makoto offered.

Haru looked down at the floor and it was disgusting. It was covered in dirt and dust and who knows what else. “Why don’t we both sleep in the bed?” Haru counter offered. He didn’t want Makoto to sleep on the nasty floor.

“A. Are you sure?” Makoto stuttered. Haru could hear the embarrassment in his voice.

“I used to share a bed with Rin all the time. I don’t think you could sleep any worse than he does.” Haru said. It wasn’t like he was lying. Rin was a terrible sleep companion. He rolls around and kicks people and can snore pretty damn loud.

“Well…” Makoto started. “If you insist.” He bent down to pick up his pants. Before he could put them back on however, Haru stopped him. “What now?” Makoto asked.

“I don’t want you to rip up the bandages in your sleep.” Haru said. “Keep the pants off.” Makoto opened his mouth as if he was going to reject, but closed his mouth with a huff instead.

Haru sighed. He kicked off his boots an unbuttoned his pants. “What are you doing?” Makoto questioned.

“I’ll sleep without my pants on too.” Haru said. He pulled down his pants and kicked them off near Makoto’s. Haru had no shame, so stripping down to his boxers in front of Makoto didn’t faze him.

“Haru…” Makoto said averting his eyes. “Y. You don’t have to do that.”

“Too late.” Haru stated. His pants were already off, there was no point putting them back on. He didn’t like sleeping in jeans anyway.

The boys took off their jackets and such and got themselves ready for bed. There was only one blanket on the bed, so they’d have to share. Makoto seemed to lie as far away from Haru as possible. It made Haru feel a little insecure for some odd reason.

Haru noticed it didn’t take long for Makoto to fall asleep after they turned out the lights. Haru listened to Makoto’s gentle, steady breathing. He realized this was the first time he had seen Makoto actually relax. Granted, Makoto had an eventful day and lost a lot of blood. It was probably a lot of work to stay awake as long as he did. Soon enough, Haru found himself drifting to sleep listening to Makoto’s breathing.

* * *

Rin had his hands stuffed in his pockets and stared down at his feet as he followed Sousuke down familiar streets. Rin knew all too well where Sousuke was taking him. The closer they got, the more anxious Rin got. He didn’t want to go with Sousuke, but he didn’t really have any other options; the sun was almost down. He wished he knew whether or not Makoto and Haru were okay. He could only assume that if they were still alive, they found a place to spend the night. Rin had Sousuke take him to where the explosion was and he couldn’t see neither Haru or Makoto, so he believed they were still alive.

Sousuke led Rin up the fire escape on the side of one of the buildings. They climbed up about eight stories and climbed in the window. They walked down the dim hallway to a simple gray door. Rin’s idea of where they were going was confirmed at this point. “You still live here?” Rin asked, a little on the rhetorical side.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Sousuke replied. He pulled his keys off his belt loop and unlocked the two locks on the door. “It was my apartment before you moved in.” Rin could sense the hostility in his tone.

Rin followed Sousuke in to the apartment and was almost instantly hit with memories he’s spent years trying to forget. The apartment had the same lay out it did three years ago when Rin left, save for a few items he only guessed Sousuke got rid of. It was the same lay out Rin had set up when they lived together. The main difference was the overwhelming stench of cigarettes and alcohol. Although Rin wanted to deny that the smells were created by Sousuke, but he knew the truth. “You started smoking again.” Rin said under his breath.

Sousuke sighed. “I never quit smoking in the first place.” He said.

“But you told me…” Rin started, but was cut off by Sousuke admitting, “I lied.”

As much as Rin wanted to continue on the subject, he decided to let the conversation die. As a matter of fact, there were several things Rin wanted to talk about, but he couldn’t bring himself to start the conversation. He wanted to know what’s been going on currently in Sousuke’s life, but at the same time he wanted to know about things from the past. He couldn’t deny that he missed being with Sousuke.

“Are you hungry?” Sousuke asked, brining Rin back in to reality.

“Not really.” Rin replied. “I think I just want to sleep.”

Sousuke nodded. “Do you want the bed or the couch?” he asked.

“I’ll just take the couch.” Rin said. He knew too many memories would come from the bedroom.

“Okay.” Sousuke said walking out of the room. He came back a few moments later with a pillow and blanket. In fact, it was the same pillow and blanket Rin would give Sousuke when he would make him sleep on the couch after they got in to an argument. Sousuke handed Rin the bedding and Rin mumbled a thank you. The bedding smelled like Sousuke, and Rin took slight comfort in that.

Sousuke grabbed something off one of the end tables that Rin couldn’t make out. “If you need me, you know where to find me.” He said. He walked down the short hallway and closed the door behind him in the back room.

Rin sat down on the couch with his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands. There was such a surge of emotions going through him and he didn’t know what to do. He wanted Haru and Makoto to be here with him. He wanted their support. Rin thought he’d never have to interact with Sousuke again after he broke up with him. He did everything in his power to prevent it. He got a new job in Iwatobi and moved out without saying a word to Sousuke, yet here he was in his old apartment with Sousuke just a few steps away. Part of him wanted to run away while Sousuke was sleeping, but another part of him wanted to go and curl up in bed with him. With a huff, Rin threw himself on to the pillow Sousuke gave him. He unconsciously inhaled and savored the familiar scent. He was pathetic; at least he knew that much.

* * *

Rin didn’t remember falling asleep, but he knew it wasn’t dusk anymore. He had no idea how long he had slept, but it was now pitch black outside. There was no chance of running away now. He sat up and took a quick glance down the hallway. The lights in the back room were out, so Rin guessed Sousuke was asleep now. He figured he might as well go to sleep and just deal with Sousuke in the morning. He laid his head back down and wrapped himself in the blanket. The bedding didn’t smell as heavily of Sousuke as they did earlier to Rin’s disappointment.

Rin tired going back to sleep, but couldn’t, resulting in an involuntary surge of emotions that reduced him to tears. Everything that had happened in the past five years suddenly came to the surface and Rin couldn’t hold it in any longer. He sobbed hard. He cried over Sousuke, Gou, Haru, his job, his parents, his life choices, everything. He was losing control of himself. He was falling apart under all the stress. He was pushing everyone who could help him away. His self-respect was falling, while his self-hate was getting stronger.

This went on for about an hour. After Rin’s episode was over, he stared numbly ahead of him. All he wanted to do now was sleep for days, but he didn’t want to do it alone. He stood up and walked down the hallway to the back room. He reached for the door knob and paused as if he was reevaluating his decision. He turned the knob and slowly opened the door. Sousuke was asleep like Rin had guessed. “S. Sousuke?” Rin said, hoping Sousuke wasn’t still a heavy sleeper.

“Rin?” Rin heard Sousuke’s husky morning voice say followed by the shuffling of sheets. Sousuke looked over to Rin. “You were crying?” he said. Even in the dark he could tell.

Rin nodded. “I. I can’t sleep.” He said, his voice failing him. He didn’t need to ask the question for Sousuke to know what he wanted. “Come here.” Sousuke said in a soft voice. Rin walked over to the bed and curled up next to Sousuke. Sousuke’s arms lightly embraced him. There were no words being said, but Rin knew Sousuke was telling him everything was going to be okay. He buried his face in Sousuke’s chest and filled his thoughts with times like this when his whole world wasn’t falling apart. He found himself slowly drifting off, but before he fell asleep he felt Sousuke’s lips press a kiss against his head, which shattered his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little fyi, feel free to give me ideas for future chapters. I always love ideas from other people.
> 
> Come yell with me on tumblr and twitter @bms408


	5. Morning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin and Sousuke have a talk about themselves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little short, but that's okay because I don't care

Haru woke up due to the blinding morning sunlight coming through the broken blinds shinning in his eyes. He grunted as he rolled over to get out of the sun’s way. His eyes shot open in shock when his face pressed up against something warm and hard. His cheeks flushed upon realizing he was lying against Makoto’s chest. It must have been colder than they expected overnight, causing the two to migrate closer to each other to keep warm. Maybe they should have kept their pants on.

As much as Haru wanted to roll away from Makoto to avoid any awkwardness if he suddenly woke up, he found the warmth was comforting. The rise and fall of Makoto’s chest and his steady heartbeat brought Haru a sense of easiness. Haru hadn’t laid this close to a man since he was a child and he had forgotten how safe it made him feel.

He closed his eyes, trying to go back to sleep while he still had the chance. He knew the second Makoto woke up enough to realize how close they were, he’d panic and back away, taking his warmth with him. Haru sighed at that thought. As nice as Makoto was, he was probably one of those “no homo” straight guys who freaks out when they accidentally do something gay. There was no way Haru would be able to get in the same bed as Makoto again, not that he was thinking about sleeping with him or anything.

Haru felt Makoto begin to stir and he swore his heart had stopped beating until Makoto stopped moving. He felt Makoto’s arms wrap lightly around his waist and his nose press into his hair. Makoto mumbled something, but Haru couldn’t make out what he said. It sounded like a name; a feminine name. He felt a little discouraged hearing the name, but at the same time he felt a sense of pure joy having Makoto’s arms wrapped around him. Maybe he wanted more than a friendship with Makoto, but that was an issue he’d deal with later. As for now, he closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep; this time in Makoto’s warm embrace.

* * *

Rin woke up in a daze. He was confused and forgot where he was. He was startled when he realized he was in Sousuke’s room. He could have sworn he fell asleep on the couch, not Sousuke’s bed. To his relief, Sousuke wasn’t in the bed. As he started to wake up more, he remembered the events that unfolded the night before. He remembered crying and crawling in to bed with Sousuke. He also remembered feeling Sousuke kiss the top of his head. Just the thought made his chest hurt.

He climbed out of the bed and stretched. He hoped he could just grab his things and sneak out before Sousuke noticed. He had to find Haru and Makoto. He still didn’t know if they were okay, let alone alive. He didn’t even want to think of the possibility that Haru was dead. If Haru was dead, Rin didn’t know if he’d be able to handle it. Right now, Haru was all he had. The location of his sister was unknown, he didn’t want to stay with Sousuke, his dad had been long gone, and his mom… he could never show his face to his mother again.

He ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. Rin took a little survey of the room. It looked almost the same as when he saw it the day he took his stuff and left. He noticed however, that things were missing, but he couldn’t quite put together what they were, but he felt it was all connected. It had been three years; of course things would change. Sousuke was an adult who could make his own decisions.

His eyes stopped on a picture frame lying face-down on one of the bedside tables. He found himself reaching for it before he could even think about what might be in the frame. It could’ve been anything; a picture of Sousuke, the stock photo that comes in the frame (Sousuke was always terrible with picture frames), or a picture of Sousuke with his new _boyfriend_. When Rin picked up the frame and flipped it over, he felt as if he had just ripped out is heart and stomped on it.

The picture was maybe four years old. It was of him and Sousuke, both laughing and happy as can be. The sky is orange behind them, countering the blue waves of the ocean. They’re not looking at the camera, but rather at each other with loving eyes. Sousuke’s hands rest lightly on Rin’s hips, while his hands are on Sousuke’s cheeks. Rin lost all the color in his face when he realized when the photo was taken.

_The soft, white sand running in between Rin’s toes made him feel calm. The waves crashed against the rocks on the shore as the sun set before him. The scene was so beautiful he couldn’t believe he was actually there. It looked like it was a picture straight out of one the postcards his dad had sent him while he was “away on business.”_

_He turned around to Sousuke, his boyfriend of almost a year now. Sousuke stood a few feet behind Rin, his expression giving Rin an unsettling feeling. “Sousuke…?” Rin questioned._

_“Rin…” Sousuke started. “There’s something I need to say.”_

_Fear made Rin’s blood run cold. He suddenly became insecure. A stabbing pain rushed through his chest. What did he do wrong? Was Sousuke breaking up with him? He thought things were going well._

_Sousuke walked toward him. He brushed stray hairs hanging in Rin’s eyes to the side. “I’ve really enjoyed my time with you…” he began._

_‘Here it comes.’ Rin bit his lip at the thought._

_Sousuke sighed with a smile. His fingers lightly brushed Rin’s cheek. He pressed his lips to Rin’s. “Rin…” Sousuke sighed peacefully. “I love you.”_

_Rin almost didn’t hear him he was so shocked. His voice got caught in his throat. His eyes watered and he brought his hands up to Sousuke’s cheeks. He felt Sousuke’s hands rest on his hips, not grab them, but rather just sat upon them. Their lips locked passionately and they pulled away with a laugh._

_“I love you too, Sousuke.”_

“Pretty pathetic, huh?” Rin was brought back to reality by a deep voice behind him. He quickly turned around, almost dropping the picture frame in the process, and saw Sousuke standing in the doorway. There go his plans of running away unnoticed.

“Why do you still have this?” Rin managed to ask.

Sousuke shrugged. “Do you remember the day it was taken?” he asked. After a few moments of silence from Rin, he continued. “It was the day I finally had the balls to confess to you.”

Rin chuckled softly. “You were such a sap…” he said, his voice laced with disappointment. He sighed.

Sousuke reached out to put a hand on Rin’s shoulder. Rin visibly tensed and jerked his shoulder away before Sousuke was able to touch him. “Please don’t touch me…” he said, his voice soft and barely higher than a whisper.

Sousuke took a few steps back, making the space between him and Rin larger. “I’m sorry.” He sighed. After Rin didn’t reply, Sousuke went to leave the room. “Why don’t you take a shower?” he offered. “You stink. I’ll make you breakfast.” He stopped for a moment. “Everything is where it was three years ago.”

Rin looked away from Sousuke as he left the room. He hadn’t realized how tightly he was gripping the picture frame. His knees felt weak. He sat on the edge of the bed, dropping the picture frame to his side. He was an idiot. He shouldn’t be here. He shouldn’t be with Sousuke. He had probably just experienced the most emotionally draining twenty-four hours of his life. He fell back on to the bed with a huff. It was going to be a long morning.

* * *

Rin stepped out of the bathroom with a towel draped over his shoulders and walked down the hallway to the main living area. It had felt good to shower with hot water and brush his teeth with toothpaste again. The entire apartment smelled delicious and Rin couldn’t stop his mouth from watering. He loved Sousuke’s cooking and if he was being honest, he missed waking up in the morning and seeing an almost naked Sousuke cooking him breakfast. When he stepped in to the kitchen, Rin was a little disappointed to see Sousuke fully clothed, not that he’d ever admit that out loud.

Rin sighed and took a seat at the island in the middle of the kitchen. “We need to talk about last night.” Rin said.

“What about last night?” Sousuke replied without turning away from his pan.

“Last night didn’t happen.” Rin answered.

“I’m pretty sure it did.”

“Well then let’s pretend it didn’t. I don’t want you to think that I forgive you and want to get back together.” Rin said.

Sousuke froze for a brief moment, then sighed. “I know, Rin. I wasn’t expecting anything from you.” He said with a defeated tone.

After a few seconds of awkward silence, Rin spoke up. “Then why let me stay here?” he asked.

“Because I still care about you.” Sousuke admitted. “A lot.”

They didn’t say anything else. Sousuke finished cooking and the two ate together in silence. Somehow Sousuke had managed to make canned mystery meat taste good. Rin couldn’t deny that he was thrilled to not be eating fish (all thanks to Haru).

After he finished eating, Rin went back in to the main living area and started to gather his things. “I’m leaving.” He said, knowing that Sousuke was somewhere behind him.

“It’s not safe out there.” Sousuke said.

“I know how to take care of myself.” Rin insisted.

“It’s obvious you don’t.” Sousuke replied; Rin taking it as an insult.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Rin questioned.

“It’s clear to me that you and your friends have no idea what you’re getting in to. Those… things might be different where you’ve been hiding, but here in Samezuka, you don’t fight them. You run away or you  die.” Sousuke explained.

“They’re called Parasites.” Rin mumbled.

“I don’t care what they’re called.” Sousuke replied. “I’m not letting you go out there and get yourself killed.”

“How are you gonna stop me?” Rin asked. Although he had every reason to fear what Sousuke could do to him, he was going to stand his ground.

Rin must have been giving off more of a fearful vibe than planned because Sousuke’s whole demeanor got softer. “Fine. Go.” He said to Rin’s surprise. Rin was confused until Sousuke added, “But I’m gonna follow you.”

“I don’t need your protection.” Rin argued. “I’m a grown ass man.”

“I don’t care.” Sousuke stated.

“If you follow me, I’ll shoot you.” Rin threatened.

“No you won’t.” Sousuke said, obviously not falling for Rin’s bait.

“Sousuke I swear to god I’ll-”

“I’m not losing you again!” Sousuke interrupted, his voice loud and panicked.

Rin was silent for a moment, a thrown back by Sousuke’s sudden outburst. “I already told you I don’t another relationship with you.” He said with his voice squeakier than he intended.

“I’m not looking for a relationship.” Sousuke almost whispered.

“Then what do you want?” Rin questioned.

“I don’t want to be alone anymore.” Sousuke admitted. Before Rin could react, Sousuke continued. “At the time, you were all I had, no matter how clique that sounds. After you left I tried to move on, I really did, but I couldn’t. Everything reminded me of you and I couldn’t get you out of my thoughts. It’s pathetic, I know.” He let out a defeated chuckle. “When you curled up in bed with me last night…” he paused for a moment. “It was the greatest I’ve felt in years. I miss you Rin.”

Rin wanted to cry. He wanted to grab Sousuke’s face and kiss him. He wanted to tell him everything was okay, just like he would years ago, but he had to stand his ground. There was no way he could handle another relationship with Sousuke, at least, he couldn’t handle another break up.

He sighed as he pulled his hair up into a ponytail. “I’m sorry.” He said.

“For what?” Sousuke replied.

“For how I left.” There was a moment of silence before Rin went on. “I… I uh, miss you too, Sousuke…”

They didn’t add anything else to the conversation. Rin looked out the window to the street below. There were probably Parasites hiding down there and he didn’t know how to deal with them. They really weren’t like the ones in Iwatobi. Having Sousuke come with him couldn’t be that bad. If anything, Rin wouldn’t have to look for Haru and Makoto alone.

Rin turned to face Sousuke, who seemed too interested with his fingernails. Rin cleared throat before speaking so that he knew he had Sousuke’s attention. “If you help me find my friends…” he started, avoiding eye contact with Sousuke. “I might not shoot you.”

Sousuke smiled softly. “Okay.” He agreed. His smile made Rin’s stomach flutter. He had no idea what he was getting himself in to, but he knew it probably wasn’t good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come yell with me on tumblr and twitter @bms408


	6. Drunk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're pretty when you're drunk." he giggled

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hold on to your hats, it's Makoharu time

Following a very uneventful morning and a quick check on their injuries from the day before, Makoto and Haru set out to find Rin. They thought about going back to the car they had brought from Iwatobi, but realized that wasn’t a smart idea; those Parasites would most likely still be around there. Instead, they roamed around in the direction of where they lost Rin. They knew he wasn’t there the previous day, but he might have decided to look for them as well.

Luckily for them, most of the Parasites were dead or missing when they got to the location where they last saw Rin. They avoided any of the ones that were still alive and just wondered the streets. They didn’t know where to even begin looking for Rin. Samezuka was a big city and it’s fairly easy to lose someone in these conditions.

After a few hours of wondering and not finding Rin, they decided to take a break. Although he wasn’t dizzy anymore, the fall from the day prier made Haru wake up with a massive headache and unfortunately, Rin had the painkillers in his bag. In addition, Haru was sure Makoto’s leg was bothering him.

The two sat at the end of an alley so that they wouldn’t attract any attention. There were plenty of places to hide if the need arose. They hadn’t spoken to each other much since they woke up, which might be because of how close they slept that morning. Makoto had woken up first, but woke up Haru when he quickly shuffled out of the bed. Haru pretended to still be asleep, but when he heard Makoto’s footsteps away from the bed, he peaked over to see Makoto at the counter in the kitchen area. His hands were gripping the countertop so hard his knuckles were white. He shook his head back and forth while whispering something Haru couldn’t make out. After about maybe ten minutes or so, Haru decided to “wake up”. Makoto seemed fine and acted as if nothing had happened. He didn’t say anything about it so Haru didn’t either.

Finally, Makoto broke the almost brutal silence by asking, “Are you worried about Rin?”

“Extremely.” Haru replied without looking up from his shoes.

“Rin’s smart. I’m sure he’s fine.” Makoto assured.

“I know he’s strong and smart enough to take care of himself, but I didn’t realize how much I missed him when he left the first time. I don’t want to lose him again.” Haru said. He sighed and there was a long pause before he added, “There’s something I haven’t told you about him.”

“Haru… you don’t need to tell me your whole life story.” Makoto insisted.

“You deserve to know.” Haru said. “Rin’s my brother.” He stopped for a second. “I guess that’s why it was so hard to see him leave.”

“He’s your brother? I never would’ve expected. I always thought you two were the same age…” Makoto said.

“We’re adoptive brothers.” Haru hugged his knees to his chest. “When I was thirteen… my parents… they died in an accident and Rin’s mom adopted me. I mean, I spent most of my time with his family anyway, but still…” Haru sighed. “He’s just always been there, you know?”

There was a long period of silence.

“Haru…” Makoto said, taking Haru’s attention off of his shoes. “I know how you feel. Well, in a way.” He looked over to Haru and their eyes locked for a split second and Haru swore he saw sparkles. “When the outbreaks happened… my siblings got sick… then it was my mom… then my dad.” He stopped speaking to run his hand through his hair. “All I had was my girlfriend.”

“W. What happened to her?” Haru asked, his voice cracking as he spoke.

“She got sick too.” Makoto said. “But that was after our daughter was born…”

“What happened to your daughter?” Haru knew he would regret asking, but he did anyway.

“She was a month old…” Makoto said and he didn’t need to say anything else for Haru to know what happened.

“I’m so sorry.” Haru said. He watched Makoto’s body language, waiting for him to start crying, but he didn’t. After a minute of silence, his smile came back.

“I try not to dwell on the past too much.” Makoto said. “I know the virus will take me too… eventually.”

* * *

The two continued to roam around until the sun started to set. They were lucky enough to have been able to avoid any Parasites they came across. They decided to spend another night in Samezuka. Just like before, Makoto easily picked the lock and got them a room. Unlike before, this room was bigger and had two beds, to Haru’s disappointment. It also didn’t smell as bad as the last one. It had a full kitchen and bathroom with working water and heat which is something both Haru and Makoto could admit they missed.

Haru cooked up some food they collected while looking for Rin and the two ate in silence. After eating, they both took advantage of the hot water and took nice, long showers. Haru let Makoto go first, even though Makoto insisted Haru go first. When Haru’s turn came around, he pondered over the idea of taking a bath, but decided against it. He stepped into the shower and the warm water felt amazing on his exhausted muscles. His hands ran over his skin and he hated how thin he was. He was probably going to die of starvation before the virus got him.

Haru stepped out of the bathroom and was welcomed by Makoto, who was sitting at the table. He walked over to said table and Makoto handed him a glass with a brown liquid inside.

“Here,” Makoto said. “After today’s events, we both could use a drink.”

“Where did you get alcohol?” Haru asked.

“While you were getting food, I went to the liquor store next door.” Makoto replied. Noticing Haru look suspiciously at the drink, he continued. “It’s just whiskey. It won’t hurt you.” He raised his glass and drank some of the whiskey.

Haru was never one to drink and he didn’t believe he was going to start now. He took a small sip and was instantly hit with the bitter taste of the alcohol. He didn’t know if the whiskey was that strong or if he was that much of a lightweight. Makoto didn’t seem to any problem with it, which gave Haru the idea that Makoto probably used alcohol as some sort of outlet. He hadn’t realized how damaged Makoto was, which could explain why he was so willing to help anyone who needed it.

A few hours and two bottles of whiskey later, Makoto was definitely drunk. Haru had barely had two glasses. Him and Makoto got caught up in conversation and Haru is sure Makoto hadn’t realized how much he had drank. If he had, he was most certainly trying to forget his existence. Makoto’s face was flushed and his words slurred. His sentences were punctuated with cute little giggles that Haru found almost irresistible. He decided that Makoto had had enough and that it was time to go to bed.

“Time for bed.” Haru said walking over to Makoto at the other side of the table.

“Aww come on Haru-chan~” Makoto whined.

“Don’t call me that.” Haru scoffed. He helped Makoto stand and walk over to the beds. He sat Makoto on the bed and turned around to go to the other bed, but was grabbed by Makoto. Haru turned around to respond, but was then pulled down into Makoto’s lap.

Makoto’s arms wrapped around Haru’s waist and looked up at Haru with big eyes and a giddy smile. “You’re pretty when you’re drunk.” He giggled.

_Did he just say he was pretty?_

“I’m not drun- _humph_!” Haru was started but was stopped by Makoto’s lips sloppily pushing against his own.

When Makoto separated their lips, Haru tried to ask what he was doing, but was interrupted again by Makoto’s lips. Makoto’s lips were warm and soft and very pleasant to Haru, even though they were wet with saliva. Under normal circumstances Haru would be disgusted, but this was Makoto; tall, strong, heavenly attractive Makoto. It didn’t take long at all for Haru to start kissing him back. His arms wrapped around Makoto’s neck, while Makoto’s pulled him flush against him. He was most definitely drunk now. Haru could feel his stress flush away. He didn’t care about anything but that moment. Nothing else mattered.

Makoto’s lips moved down to suck and nip at Haru’s jawline and neck. An electric sensation of pleasure rushed through Haru, stopping at his groin. Makoto’s touches made him feel a way he’s never felt before. Haru’s felt the hands of other men on his body before, and he never reacted like this. When Makoto moved his hands up his shirt, he felt as if time had stopped. Makoto’s hands cupped Haru’s chest and Haru realized he hadn’t been breathing and let out a gasp for air. He held back a moan as Makoto started massaging his chest.

Makoto started mumbling something, bringing Haru out of his trance. “Your breasts are so cute, Haru-chan~” Makoto mumbled with a giggle.

It suddenly felt as if Haru was hit by a truck. Realizing the situation he was currently in, Haru pushed Makoto away (making his drunken ass fall back onto the bed with a giggle) and ran into the bathroom, locking the door behind him. His back slid down the door and he hugged his knees tightly to his chest. _What was he thinking?_ Makoto was straight and that wasn’t going to change. Of course Makoto would think he was a girl when he’s drunk; his feminine name and thin body structure to blame.

Haru’s skin felt hot everywhere Makoto had touched. His fingers grazed over a spot on his neck where Makoto took great interest. He sighed and took notice of how tight his pants felt. _‘Figures’_ he thought to himself. _How could he not get hard with Makoto touching him like that?_ His one hand dipped into his pants while the other brought his shirt up so he could fondle with his chest like Makoto was just doing.

“Makoto~” he sighed as he tried relieving himself. It didn’t take much effort for Haru’s back to arch off the door as he saw white stars, getting his desperately needed release.

* * *

The next morning, Haru woke up much earlier than Makoto. He didn’t really know what to do with himself, but he knew he didn’t want to be alone with his thoughts at the moment, not after the previous night’s events. Therefore, he climbed out of bed and walked into the kitchen area. He considered taking a bath, but quickly decided against it when images from the night before flashed through his memory. Instead, he decided to sketch in his little sketchbook that he always carried around (which got a little embarrassing when he realized he was drawing what a certain someone might look like naked).

Makoto finally woke up about two hours after Haru. He groaned loudly at the sunlight in the room, catching Haru’s attention. Haru looked over in time to see Makoto pull the covers over his face. “Why is the daytime so fucking bright?” he groaned loudly, his voice husky with sleep. Haru just hummed in agreement. “I think I may have had too much to drink last night.” Makoto sheepishly admitted.

Haru’s face flushed, but luckily for him, Makoto couldn’t see him. “H. how much do you remember from last night?” Haru asked before he could stop himself.

“I remember drinking with you at the table, then it goes blank.” Makoto said. “Why? Did I do something last night?” He peaked out of the blankets with concern painting his expression.

“Not really.” Haru lied. “You just boasted about your girlfriend.”

“Oh, okay.” Makoto said, his tone throwing Haru a little off. He tucked himself back into his blanket mound. “My head fucking hurts…” he complained.

It was silent for a few minutes before Haru broke it by stating, “I think we should go back to the cabin.”

“But what about Rin?” Makoto asked, peaking his head out of the blankets again.

“Rin knows where the cabin is. He can get back there himself.” Haru said.

Makoto didn’t answer right away. He stared at Haru, basically reading him. “If you say so.” He finally said, not pushing for any more of an answer from Haru.

* * *

It took Makoto a few hours to recover from his hangover enough for them to head out. Their plan was to steal another car and drive back to the cabin. They would figure out what they would do next after they got there. Haru knew he wouldn’t survive another night in Samezuka with Makoto without doing something he’d regret. He needed to be able to make space between them so that he could figure his own emotions out.

They wondered for a bit, giving one last hope that they would bump into Rin, but didn’t find him. When they came across a used car lot, time was up. Before they made it to the lot however, Haru was nearly knocked over by someone running into him from behind. He turned around to see a red-headed girl bowing her head.

“I’m so sorry.” She apologized. The way her hair fell to her trembling shoulders made her look so much like Rin…

“Kou?” Haru questioned before he could think.

The girl looked up at him with wide eyes. “H. Haru?” she replied. She practically jumped into his arms with excitement when she recognized him. “I’m so glad to see you.”

It had been almost three years since Haru last saw Gou. She had left to go to school, and hopefully find Rin. He hadn’t heard from her much in between, but she had contacted him a few times. She didn’t look very different, the most obvious difference being her now short hair.

“Are you alright? What are you doing out here? What are you running from? Are you alone?” Haru began playing twenty questions before he could hold himself back. _God he sounded like Rin._

“I’m fine. I was just getting away from a group of those creatures and wasn’t looking where I was going.” Gou said.

“There you are!” A voice behind Gou called, making her turn around. Haru looked over her shoulder to see a man with flaming red hair running toward her. Instinctively, he pushed her behind his arm. “Who the fuck are you?” he asked the stranger.

“Who the fuck are **you**?” the stranger asked, mirroring the question back.

Haru looked as if he was going to lunge at the man (who was most definitely much larger than Haru), but Gou intervened. “Haru, it’s okay,” she said, getting Haru’s attention. “He’s my fiancé.”

“Fiancé?” Haru questioned, a little shocked.

“Haru, this is Seijurro; Sei, this is my brother Haru.” Gou introduced them. She happened to glance over Haru’s shoulder and caught a sight of Makoto, who just seemed to be lingering in the background. She looked back over to Haru with the same shit eating grin Rin has. “Are you going to introduce me to your boyfriend?” she asked.

“What?!” Haru exclaimed, whipping his head around to look at Makoto, who was blushing just as much as he was. “He’s not my boyfriend. He’s just a friend.” Haru tried to sound convincing, but crack in his voice ruined it.

“If you say so…” she said with that shit eating grin still on her face. It was obvious to tell her and Rin were related.

After taking a brief moment to recover, Haru introduced Makoto. He then explained their current situation and their plan to go back to the cabin for the time being.

“Rin’s here? In Samezuka?” Gou questioned.

Haru nodded in reply.

“We lost him after the explosion. We’ve already spent two days looking for him and haven’t found any sign of him.” Makoto added.

“Is he… okay?” Gou asked.

“Well, we haven’t found him dead yet, so it’s safe to assume-”

“No,” Haru interrupted Makoto. “He’s not okay. He doesn’t sleep, he doesn’t eat, but he refuses to tell me anything.” Haru knew he could say these things to Gou because she would understand. She knew their brother just as well as he did. “He’s pretty fucked, Kou.”

“Haru…” Gou said. The two locked eyes and spoke a thousand words with just their eyes. Gou was telling him it was okay and he felt himself relax.

The group conversed for a little while, resulting in Haru and Makoto offering to bring Gou and her fiancé back to the cabin with them, in which they agreed. The drive back to the cabin was generally quiet, which was most likely because it got late. The drive back felt longer than it did to Samezuka. When they got to the cabin, Haru was the first one in and he was relieved to see everything the way he left it. Makoto and Haru put away the supplies they had collected and showed Gou and her fiancé around the cabin. The issue with sleeping arrangements was quickly resolved when Makoto offered to give them his room. With Gou and her fiancé settling (and probably sleeping at this point) in their room, Haru and Makoto were left alone in the living room and being alone with Makoto was probably the last thing Haru wanted.

“Haru, we need to talk.” Makoto said.

“Talk about what?” Haru replied with a question.

“Last night.”

“I already told you nothing happened.” Haru insisted.

“I know something happened.” Makoto objected. “You’re just not telling me what.”

“Nothing happened.” Haru argued. “You talked about your girlfriend and then passed out.”

“You’re lying to me and I know it. You said earlier I boasted about my girlfriend.” Makoto said.

“Yeah, so?”

“I **never** boast about her. I didn’t love her!” Makoto shrunk as the words left his mouth, as if it was such a shameful thing to say. “I only stayed with her because I knocked her up,” he added, his voice significantly softer.

It fell horrifically silent and the atmosphere felt like it could suffocate you at any second.

Haru sighed and turned away from Makoto. He struggled to formulate his thoughts in to a sentence. “A. are you…” he stuttered, “… gay?”

Makoto blinked as if he didn’t understand the question. “No?” he replied, his response more of a question than an answer.

“Good night.” Haru said, standing up off the couch. Before giving Makoto any time to respond, he rushed up the stairs and to his room. He closed the door behind him and flopped on to the bed. He pushed his face in to his pillow, nearly suffocating himself. He wanted to scream. It was a bad, no, terrible idea to bring Makoto along with them. It was just his luck; falling for the guy who was straight.

He tried going to sleep so he could temporarily forget his emotions, but he wound up just replaying the previous night with Makoto in his head, over and over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter got a little deeper than expected, but oh well ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> I'm always open to suggestions.
> 
> Come yell with me on tumblr and twitter @bms408


	7. One Last Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sourin gets intimate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I want to start off by apologizing for how long this update took. If anyone read my tumblr post, you know that I've been going through a lot in the past 2 months and I haven't had the energy to work. On said tumblr post however, I mentioned a bonus scene. I'll talk about that in the end notes.
> 
> I just wanted to thank you guys for your patience with me.

Having successfully avoided all interactions with Makoto for almost a week, Haru had had more than enough time to get over what happened between him and Makoto, yet he didn’t. Makoto had tried talking to him, but he would quickly escape the conversation and hide somewhere. He felt a sort of stabbing pain in his chest whenever he would see Makoto’s hurt expression, but he couldn’t face him; not after how clueless Makoto was towards his feelings for him.

Haru stood outside on the porch, watching as the rain poured down. He was hoping Rin was okay and everyday stood outside and waited for him to come home, but he didn’t. It was almost April, meaning it would soon be the start of the rainy season. It would become a lot harder to stock up with very little visibility. On the brighter side of things, there were now two more men to help stock up once Rin came back.

Haru flinched when he felt a hand rest on his shoulder. His first thought was it was Makoto and he would be forced into a conversation he wasn’t ready to have. When he turned around, he was relieved to see it was only Gou.

“I’m sorry,” she apologized. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Haru nodded in response.

After a minute of silence, Gou continued. “Is everything alright?” she asked.

“I’m fine,” Haru responded.

“I really don’t think you are,” Gou stated with a pout. “You’re avoiding Makoto like he’s the black plague.”

Haru scoffed. “Did he send you out here to talk to me?” he said with irritation lacing his voice.

“No,” Gou said. “But I know you’ve been avoiding him, even though you don’t want to.”

“What are you talking about? He’s just some stranger Rin and I found in Iwatobi. He helped us out, so we let him stay here with us.”

“I’m not an idiot, Haru.”

Haru gave his adoptive sister a look that told her he didn’t follow.

“It’s obvious you like him,” Gou answered the unasked question. “And I mean like like him. The way you look at him… I can’t remember the last time I saw you look that happy.”

Haru sighed, knowing all too well there was no way he could get away with denying it. Gou could see right through him; much better than Rin could. “It doesn’t matter whether I like him or not,” he said. “He’s not gay.”

Gou went to respond, but didn’t. The two stood in silence listening to the rain hitting the roof above them. Haru noticed Gou shivering and slipped off his back jacket, handing it to her.

“Won’t you get cold?” Gou asked even though she accepted the jacket.

“The hoodie will be enough,” Haru replied.

After another period of silence, Gou spoke up. “When did Rin come back?” she asked.

“Shortly after you left,” Haru answered. “But we didn’t bump into each other until about a year after that.”

“Oh,” Gou said. “What happened to him?”

“I don’t know,” Haru sighed. “All I know is he became an EMT. He hasn’t told me anything else.”

“I thought he wanted to become an Olympian,” Gou stated.

Haru just shrugged in response. In all the time Rin has been back, he never once talked about what happened in Samezuka and why he gave up his dream from when he was little.

“What about you?” Haru asked. “What have you been up to?”

“Well, after you had gone off to school, I figured I would spend some time looking around for Rin. I went to Samezuka for a week to look at some colleges, but mainly look for Rin.” Gou said. “While looking at one of the schools, I met Seijuro and we started talking, which eventually turned into dating. He’d drive over to Iwatobi to see me, but after being together two years, we decided it would be easier if I just moved in with him in Samezuka. I told mom that I was just transferring to a better school in Samezuka. I don’t think she even knows about him.” Gou paused for a moment. “We got engaged right before people started getting sick, and well, now we’re here.”

Haru just stared at her, unable to come up with a response. He felt a little guilty. He missed just as much of his sister’s life as Rin had.

Noticing Haru’s stare, Gou continued to answer the unasked questions. “After I moved in with Sei, I kinda just forgot about finding Rin. It wasn’t until I saw you that I realized how much I really missed you guys.”

Haru smiled. “Don’t worry,” he said. “We missed you too.”

Gou returned the smile with a soft giggle. She walked over and pressed a light kiss on his cheek. “Don’t push him away, Haru,” she said softly.

Haru watched as she returned to the house, know exactly who she was referring to.

* * *

Rin sat in the window watching as raindrops ran down the glass. He had been stuck with Sousuke for a week too long. He found himself getting too comfortable with Sousuke (and his bed), and he didn’t want to. He wanted to be back with Haru so that he knew he was okay. After thinking about it, he decided the best option would be to go back to the cabin and hope that Makoto and Haru will be there.

“I need you to take me to Iwatobi,” Rin stated, catching the attention of Sousuke.

“Why?” Sousuke asked.

“Because I don’t want to be here,” Rin said simply as if Sousuke should have known.

“Come on, Rin,” Sousuke said, his voice indicating his offense. “I’m not just letting you leave to fend for yourself.”

“I have a place near Iwatobi,” Rin added.

“Rin…” Sousuke started but could not come up with what to say.

“If you won’t take me, I’ll take myself,” Rin threatened.

“Why don’t you just stay here?” Sousuke offered. “I’ll protect you.”

“I don’t need your protection,” Rin insisted. “I need to find my friends that **you** blew up.”

“Are you still upset about that? I saved your life doing it.”

“Of course I’m still upset. You could’ve killed them!”

There was a long moment of silence.

Sousuke sighed. “Fine. I’ll drive you, but not until the rain stops.”

Rin just nodded in response and returned his attention back to staring out the window.

* * *

By nightfall, the rain still had not stopped. Rin was annoyed having to spend another night with Sousuke. He needed to get away so he could put his feelings on check. More often than not, Rin spent his nights in Sousuke’s bed; not because he wanted to be with Sousuke or anything like that, but rather he liked getting a full night’s sleep again. When feelings toward Sousuke would bubble in his chest, he would immediately push them away. Even so, Rin knew damn well he wanted to be with Sousuke. He missed him and, god, did he want to kiss him, but he needed to be bigger than himself. Dating Sousuke brings nothing but trouble; or at least that’s what Rin conditioned himself to think.

Sousuke was in the kitchen cooking dinner and Rin knew he could easily walk up to him and steal a kiss. Realizing what he was thinking, he quickly erased the idea from his mind. He had to stop thinking like that. By tomorrow, he would be back at the cabin with Sousuke far away. These feelings could be pushed away for good.

Rin hadn’t noticed Sousuke walk into the room until he called his name. He looked up at Sousuke, seeing the worried expression on the larger man’s face.

“Are you okay?” Sousuke asked.

“Yeah,” Rin replied.

“Are you sure? I’ve been calling for you for five minutes,” Sousuke continued.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you,” Rin said.

Sousuke sat down on the couch next to Rin. “You’re crying,” he said, wiping away a tear from Rin’s cheek with his thumb.

Rin hadn’t even realized he was crying. He wiped his eyes and turned his head to the side.

“Rin, talk to me,” Sousuke insisted.

Rin didn’t reply. With his back turned to Sousuke he didn’t see him move forward and hug him from behind. He felt Sousuke’s forehead rest on his shoulder. Sousuke sighed.

“I want to see you happy again,” Sousuke admitted. “I want to make you happy again.”

Rin remained silent, refusing to reply.

Sousuke sighed again and stood up. “Well, if you’re interested, the food is ready,” he said. He walked out of the room, leaving Rin sitting alone.

* * *

It wasn’t until almost midnight that the rain had finally stopped. Sousuke said he would take Rin home when the rain stopped and he was not going to be allowed to back out of that promise. Sousuke had been in his bedroom about an hour and could quite possibly be sleeping. If he was, he wouldn’t be for long.

Rin walked up to Sousuke’s door and knocked before slowly opening the door. To his surprise, Sousuke was awake and sitting at the edge of the bed. He looked up at Rin with puffy red eyes, implying he had just recently been crying.

“It stopped raining,” Rin said plainly.

“Your point?” Sousuke replied.

“You said you’d take me to Iwatobi when it stopped raining,” Rin stated.

“Rin, it’s the middle of the night,” Sousuke said with a sigh.

“But you told me-”

“I know what I told you,” Sousuke interrupted. He sighed again. “Can’t you just give me one more night?”

“No,” Rin replied. “I want to get as far away from you as possible.”

“But why? What the hell did I do to you?” Sousuke questioned.

“Do you really need to ask that?”

“Yes I do,” Sousuke said. “You walked out on me without saying a word.”

“You’re a drug addict,” Rin said.

Sousuke scoffed. “You’re still on that? I was in pain; lots of it. You know that,” he said. “It was only Vicatin; the drug **you** told me to take. You made a bigger deal of it than it was.”

“It was a big deal, Sousuke,” Rin argued. “An addiction is an addiction. You got violent when you went through withdraw. It was scary.”

“I’m sorry,” Sousuke sighed. “But that was years ago. I haven’t had a narcotic since you left. After you left, I got clean, hoping I’d get to see you again.”

“It wasn’t just the drugs,” Rin admitted.

“Then what was it?” Sousuke asked. “I can’t make it right if you don’t tell me what to fix.”

“Do you know how hard it was to date you? I gave up everything for you,” Rin said.

“No one asked you to do that.”

“But I did anyway. I was happy with you. I didn’t regret a thing, but then I got the call,” Rin said, turning his head away from Sousuke. “Do you know scared I was? When you’re an EMT, the last thing you want to do is have to keep your boyfriend alive in the back of an ambulance.”

“I told you before; the accident wasn’t my fault,” Sousuke defended himself.

“I know that, but everything went downhill from there,” Rin said softly.

Silence washed over the two men. Being able to express his feelings to Sousuke made Rin feel exceptionally better. Maybe if he had stayed and talked things out, he and Sousuke would not have broken up in the first place, or at least not on such bad terms. The thought made him cry, and hard. His body started reacting before his mind, and the next thing he knew, he was sitting in Sousuke’s lap; his head resting on Sousuke’s shoulder as he sobbed.

Sousuke’s arms tightened around Rin’s waist, pulling him as close as he could be. “Rin…” he nearly whispered. “I… I still love you…”

Rin’s breath hitched. “Me too…” he squeaked. “And I hate it. I don’t want to love you anymore. I can’t handle it. I love you and I hate myself for it.”

Sousuke brought one of his hands up to tilt up Rin’s chin. Their lips pressed together in a way that was hard for Rin to describe. It was soft but passionate, and it just felt sad. Rin’s hands moved up to cup Sousuke’s cheeks. He deepened the kiss, realizing how much he missed the taste of Sousuke’s lips. He brushed his tongue against Sousuke’s lips asking for entry. Sousuke granted permission and Rin sloppily kissed him, their teeth clattering against each other’s.

Sousuke’s one hand ran up Rin’s stomach under his shirt while the other rested on Rin’s hip. This made Rin push away from Sousuke. “I… I can’t do this,” he said. “I shouldn’t do this.” He tried to pull himself up, but could not bring himself to do it. “But, god, do I want to…”

“Rin…” Sousuke sighed. “Just give me one night with you again. Let me make you feel good one last time. After that, I’ll leave you alone. I’ll take you to Iwatobi and it’ll be over.”

Rin sighed and settled back down in Sousuke’s lap. He closed his eyes and felt Sousuke’s lips on his neck. He let out a long exhale of air. “I missed you so much…” he whispered. Rin knew it was going to be a long night and he was going to make it count.

* * *

_It was a calm night for Rin and his partner, which was a little strange considering it was a Friday night in Samezuka. He was bored, and frankly, hoping someone would get shot so he would have something to do. A call finally came in around eleven, which was on hour before Rin’s shift was over. There was a car wreck downtown. It wouldn’t be a lot of work by the sounds of it, but at least it was something to do. However, when Rin made it to the site of the accident, it was the last thing he had expected._

_The next thing Rin remembered was being in the back of the ambulance, struggling to keep Sousuke awake. He didn’t know if Sousuke suffered a head injury or not, but he did know that he was quickly bleeding out. He cried as he tried to stop the bleeding as much as possible._

_“What’s your name, sir?” Rin asked in an attempt to keep the man conscious._

_“Yamazaki Sousuke,” he answered._

_“I need you to stay awake, Sousuke,” Rin said._

_Rin knew he had to stay strong. Sousuke was pretty beat up. He was covered in cuts and bruises and probably broke a rib or two. His worst injury was his shoulder; it had almost been completely torn up. Rin cried even more at the thought of how much pain Sousuke was in._

_“Is there someone you want me to call when we get to the hospital?” Rin continued, keeping his voice as strong as he could._

_“Rin…” Sousuke said._

_Rin felt his stomach tie in a knot. “I’m right here, baby,” Rin said before he could stop himself. He pushed the hair off of Sousuke’s forehead and kissed it. “You’re gonna be okay; I promise.”_

* * *

Rin woke up with Sousuke still lying beside him; his head resting on Sousuke’s good shoulder. He forgot how peaceful mornings with Sousuke could be. His heart started beating fast as he considered getting up and running away as fast as possible.

“Don’t you even think about running away,” Sousuke said. Rin had not realized he was awake until just then. “I told you I’d take you to Iwatobi and I meant it. Just… stay here a little longer.”

“Sousuke, I said I…”

“I’m not asking you for a relationship. I’m not even asking you to stay with me… I just missed you so much…” Sousuke sighed. “I just wanna make up for how shitty I was years ago. I wanna make up for all the pain I caused you. I’m really sorry, Rin.”

“I never said I wouldn’t forgive you,” Rin started. “But I’ve moved on.”

“No you haven’t,” Sousuke argued. “That’s not what you were saying last night. I get that you don’t want to be with me; I really do, but I’m not just gonna sit here and listen to you deny that you felt anything.”

Rin sat up. “Of course I felt something; I’m not denying that,” he snapped. “But I didn’t want to feel anything.”

Sousuke sighed. “Why do you punish yourself for letting yourself enjoy what you’re doing?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re not letting yourself admit that you enjoyed having sex with me,” Sousuke said. He sat up behind Rin and reached out to him, but quickly pulled back.

“I did enjoy it,” Rin admitted. “It was the best sex I’ve had in a long time.”

“Then why are you trying so hard to leave?”

“Because it’s you,” Rin replied. “When I’m around you, it feels like I’m falling in love all over again and I don’t want that. You don’t understand how hard it is to keep pushing my feelings back when every time I see your stupid face I want to kiss it.”

Rin was now facing Sousuke. Sousuke was not thinking properly and leaned forward to lock lips with Rin. Almost as quickly as it started, Rin shoved him away.

“No!” Rin exclaimed. He stood up and stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that bonus scene I mentioned...
> 
> It's smut. Or at least it could be. I'm only going to write it if enough people want it. I plan to post it to tumblr, but I will link to it in this chapter after it's posted. So, comment if you want it and if not, tell me another idea for a bonus scene instead.
> 
> Read the bonus scene here>> http://archiveofourown.org/works/7362028   
> or here>> http://bms408.tumblr.com/post/146771219096/one-last-night


	8. Not So Happy Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Basically, everyone is mad

After showering for over an hour, Rin had finally cooled down. When he walked out of the bathroom, he saw Sousuke sitting on the couch reading. Rin had guessed he was going back to distancing himself. He felt a sense of relief with that. He was hoping that maybe Sousuke finally understood that he wanted nothing to do with him anymore. Of course, Rin still felt bad for the way he rushed out of the room like he did, but he had to put that behind him. Now, he had one goal in mind and that was getting back to Haru and Makoto.

Sousuke must have had a sixth sense or something because he knew Rin was in the room before Rin could make a sound.

“Do you still want me to take you to Iwatobi or would you rather go alone?” Sousuke asked not looking up from what he was reading.

“Do you still want to take me?” Rin replied.

“I’d know you made it there alive,” Sousuke said.

“Then, I’d rather have you take me,” Rin said.

“Okay. Whenever you’re ready, we’ll go.”

Rin nodded even though Sousuke never brought his eyes up from his reading.

Rin gathered his things (which wasn’t much) and followed Sousuke to the underground garage that the building had. Sousuke directed Rin to an older, clunky pick-up truck. It most certainly was not the car Sousuke was driving when they were dating, but Rin could understand that he probably stole it. If angelic Makoto was willing to steal a car, then Sousuke definitely would be.

The two silently got into the truck. Sousuke tossed the duffle bag he was carrying (Sousuke had explained that he always carried a bag with his valuables with him because he never knew if he was going to make it home) in the back seat while Rin stuffed his bag at his feet. When Sousuke started the truck with it key it shocked Rin.

“I sold the car and bought this,” Sousuke answered the unasked question.

Rin nodded in response and turned his attention outside the window. He was relieved that he was going back to the cabin where he would hopefully find Haru and Makoto, but at the same time his heart felt heavy. Even though Rin had left in such a shitty way, Sousuke still helped him in his time of need. Rin also had not realized how much he had missed Sousuke. Part of him wished that he had never left Sousuke in the first place. The idea of being with Sousuke throughout everything that’s happened made Rin smile internally. Rin felt a warm feeling knowing that Sousuke still cared about him, but he could not let Sousuke know that.

Sousuke pulled out of the garage and began driving in the direction of Iwatobi. There was no conversation during the drive, giving Rin plenty of time to deal with his inner turmoil. Upon arriving to Iwatobi’s city line, Sousuke stopped the truck.

“You said your place was near Iwatobi, right?” Sousuke asked.

“Uh, yeah,” Rin replied. “It’s about an hour hike from here.

“An hour?” Sousuke questioned. “Do you want me to drive you closer?”

Rin was silent. He did not know what to say even though he had so much to say.

“Rin?” Sousuke tried again. “I need to know what you want or else I’m taking you back to Samezuka with me.”

“I don’t want to go back to Samezuka,” Rin finally said. “But I don’t want you to go back either,” he added before Sousuke could respond.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know,” Rin said as he started crying. “I want you to go away and leave me alone but at the same time I want you to stay with me because I missed you and I didn’t realize how much you still cared about me even though I left you in one of the shittiest ways possible but I want you to leave because I want to hate you but I can’t because I still love you and still want you around but I don’t because I want to get over you and move on but the world’s ending so what’s the point but at the same time I _–humph_ …”

Rin was silenced by Sousuke’s lips pressing against his. Unlike that morning however, Rin did not push him away. Instead, he cupped Sousuke’s cheeks with his hands and deepened the kiss. He tried getting himself as close as possible to Sousuke, but had very limited space in the front seat.

Sousuke pulled away from Rin for a moment. “I thought you didn’t want this?” he sighed.

“Just shut up,” Rin said as he pulled Sousuke back in.

* * *

It started raining again, which was not much of a surprise to Haru. It did not bother him. Haru loved water in all its forms. However, the rain meant staying inside and inside there were not many places to hide from Makoto. He knew he would have to confront the issues with Makoto eventually, but he did not want to do it until Rin came back.

Haru was in the kitchen boiling a pot of water to make tea for Gou and him. He stared outside the screen of the back door somewhat hoping to see Rin walk up.

“There you are,” a voice said from the other side of the room. Unfortunately for Haru, the voice belonged to Makoto.

Haru turned around to see Makoto standing in the doorway of the kitchen. “It wasn’t like I was hiding,” he lied as he went back to staring out the screen.

“Really? So you haven’t been avoiding me all week?” Makoto rhetorically asked.

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” Haru continued to lie.

“Bullshit,” Makoto exclaimed. “Whenever I’d walk in a room, you’d walk out. Every time I try to talk to you, you find an excuse to be somewhere else. What did I do?”

Haru did not respond as he stared at the rain hitting the mud.

“Don’t ignore me, Haru.”

“I’m not ignoring you,” Haru said. “I just don’t have anything to say.”

“What about all the talking with Gou you’ve been doing? I’ve heard my name come out of your mouth multiple times. You can tell her but you can’t tell me?”

“She’s my fucking sister!” Haru exclaimed. “Why were you eaves dropping on our conversations? Haven’t you heard of a thing called privacy?”

“I was hoping maybe I’d find out why you’re acting like this.”

“Why don’t you stay out of my business and worry about your own problems?” Haru questioned.

“Because it’s my problem when it’s about me,” Makoto said as he backed Haru into the wall. His voice drastically softened as he spoke. “Was it when I got drunk? Did I hurt you or something? Please tell me what I did,” Makoto pleaded. “I…I don’t want you to avoid me…”

Haru sighed. He had no choice but to talk at this point. “It’s not about what you did,” Haru admitted. “It’s about what I did in return…”

“Haru,” Makoto sighed. “Please tell me what happened; at least on my part.”

As much as Haru wanted to tell Makoto about what had happened, he was scared that if he did, Makoto would run away and never come back.

Makoto must have sensed Haru’s fear because he lightly pushed up Haru’s chin as he softly said, “Please…”

Haru looked up at Makoto and they made eye contact. In that moment, the time seemed to stop. Haru looked at Makoto’s lips and then back at his eyes. He noticed Makoto do the same thing. Makoto started slowly moving in closer to him and instead of pushing him away like he should have, Haru started decreasing the distance between them. They were close enough that their noses could touch and their lips were only milliseconds away from locking together when the tea kettle started to whistle, causing Makoto to quickly retreat away from Haru and Haru to nearly jump out of his skin.

Haru rushed over to the stove to turn off the heat and stop the whistling. He turned around to see Makoto hiding his face in his hands.

“M. Makoto, I…”

“We’ll talk later, Haru. I’m gonna go shower,” Makoto said as he nearly ran out of the kitchen.

Haru dropped himself into one of the wooden chairs at the table and groaned loudly into his hands; loud enough for Gou to come in and check on him.

“What just happened in here?” she asked. “First, Makoto comes running out with his face as red as a beet and now you’re groaning into your hands.”

“He was gonna kiss me…” Haru said. “At least, I thought he was, so I was gonna kiss him back, but then the kettle started whistling and then Makoto ran away.”

Gou sat down in the chair next to Haru and grabbed his hand.

“I don’t get it,” Haru sighed. “Why do I feel like this?”

“Haru, I’ve already told you,” Gou said. Haru looked up at her confused. “You _like_ this boy.”

“But I’ve never _liked_ anyone before. Why would I suddenly start now?”

Gou made a gasp that sounded so faked it could have been used in a cartoon. “Maybe it’s because he’s your soul mate?” she claimed.

“Soul mates don’t exist, Kou,” Haru said. “That’s just something guys say to get laid quicker.”

Gou huffed. “You have to stop being so pessimistic all the time,” she sighed.

“I’m not being a pessimist,” Haru insisted. “I’m just looking at the truth.”

Gou sighed, but instead of it sounding disappointed or upset it sounded happy. “You and Rin have always been so stubborn,” she said with a smile. “If you want my advice, just tell him the truth. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I suppose you’re right,” Haru sighed.

“Everything will work out, Haru. I promise.”

* * *

Rin and Sousuke pulled up to the cabin and silently sat in the truck. It was raining fairly hard outside so Rin used it as an excuse to stay in the truck a little longer.

“Sousuke…” Rin said to get the other man’s attention. “Thank you.”

“I told you I’d much rather drive you here than have you walk it alone,” Sousuke replied.

“No no,” Rin said. “I mean for everything. Saving me from the Parasites, letting me stay with you, and well…” Rin turned his face to the side and blushed. “The best dicking I’ve had in a long ass time.”

“I’d do it all again,” Sousuke said with a soft smile.

The truck grew silent again, the only sound coming from the rain hitting the outside of the truck. Rin was having difficulties wrapping his head around the idea that this could be the last time he sees Sousuke ever again. It was hard enough for him to leave the first time and now he was about to do it a second time, but what was even more worrisome was what was inside the cabin. Rin had no idea if Haru and Makoto made it back or not and there is always the possibility that, while they were away, someone broke in and was now living there. What if Rin walked in and the place was empty? He would have to live on his own and he did not like the idea of that.

“Will you stay with me?” Rin asked under his breath.

“What?”

“I. I don’t know if Haru will be in there or not…” Rin said. “I don’t want to take the risk of being alone again… Please…”

“Rin…” Sousuke sighed. “Of course.”

“I know I’ve been such a jerk and I understand if you- wait, did you say yes?”

“I did.”

“But your place in Samezuka is so much better. It has hot water and it isn’t falling apart.”

“Maybe that’s so, but there’s one thing my place doesn’t have,” Sousuke said.

“What?”

“You,” Sousuke said simply.

Rin’s cheeks flushed and he covered his face. “You’re still such a sap,” he said into his hand.

By the time their conversation had ended, the rain had subsided to just a light drizzle. They got out of the truck and Rin led Sousuke to the back door. Rin explained that the front door was usually locked and Haru had the only key, and if the back door was locked, he knew how to break in without causing a lot of damage. When the two walked to the back of the cabin, Rin could see light coming from the kitchen, which he took as a good sign. A few feet in front of the door, Rin froze. An eternal amount of relief came over him when he saw Haru sitting at the table. Rin nearly ran in through the back door, completely ignoring whatever Sousuke was saying.

“Haru…” Rin said as he entered the kitchen.

“Rin?” Haru said as he quickly stood up.

Rin tightly hugged Haru even though he knew Haru would not like it, but to his surprise, Haru was hugging him back. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” they both said.

“Where’s Makoto? Is he okay?” Rin asked after they released each other.

“He’s fine. It’s just…” Haru paused. It was in that moment that he noticed Sousuke. “I’ll explain later. As for now, mind telling me who that is behind you?”

“Haru, this is Yamazaki Sousuke,” Rin said. “He’s… an old friend of mine.”

“An old friend?” Haru questioned. “How come I’ve never heard of him before?”

Before Rin could come up with an answer, another voice was added to the conversation.

“Haru, who are you talking to in here?” the voice asked.

Rin looked over Haru’s shoulder to see Gou walking into the kitchen. “G. Gou?”

“Rin?” she replied.

Rin walked toward her cautiously, not sure how Gou would react. He had not spoken to her since before he left in the first place. He did not know if she was still mad about it. What he did know was that he was thrilled to see her.

“It’s been a while,” Rin said. “I uh, like your hair,” he added, noticing Gou’s now short hair.

Gou did not respond. She just moved closer and pulled her brother into a hug. “Just stop,” she said.

Rin happily hugged her back and buried his face in her shoulder. Soon enough the water works started. He had had such a hard time forgiving himself for leaving, in fact, he hated himself for it, but Gou did not seem to have any form of hate towards him. “I’m so sorry,” he repeated over and over. “I missed you so much. I never should have left. I should have stayed with you and Haru. I’m such an idiot.”

“That doesn’t matter anymore,” Gou said. “I don’t care about that. I’m just really happy you’re back.”

In that moment, Rin did not hate himself. He knew even though he had left, he was still loved and that idea made him feel the happiest he has been in a long time.

* * *

Eventually, Rin was introduced to Seijuro, which Haru had to admit was a comical interaction, and Sousuke was introduced to everyone in the house. The rain had stopped a long while ago and it was now dark outside, the only light coming from the house and the moon. Haru sat on the patio staring out into the darkness. He had had quite the exhausting day and it still was not over. Makoto still wanted to talk and Haru was not quite sure he would be able to handle that conversation.

Haru heard the door open behind him. _Speak of the devil_. Haru turned around and was surprised to see it was not Makoto, but rather Rin’s friend.

“Oh, I didn’t realize you were out here,” Sousuke said.

Something about this guy did not sit right with Haru. “Who exactly are you to Rin?” he questioned.

Sousuke glared at Haru and lit a cigarette. “That’s none of your business,” he said.

“It’s my business when it’s about Rin,” Haru replied.

“Rin told you I was a friend.”

“And I didn’t buy it. He said you were an old friend,” Haru said. “If you were an old friend, I would’ve known about you.”

“What makes you so sure?” Sousuke asked.

“I know him better than you.”

“At least that’s what you think,” Sousuke added.

“I don’t think, I know,” Haru said with irritation in his tone. “And I know I mean more to him than you do.”

Sousuke laughed, which only made Haru angrier. “Don’t get all pissy because he left you for me,” Sousuke said.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Haru asked. “Rin didn’t leave me for someone. He wouldn’t do that.”

“Who are you to Rin then? Because, until a few days ago, I had never heard him even say your name,” Sousuke said.

“You’re lying,” Haru insisted.

“I’m not,” Sousuke said. “What are you? An ex?”

“An ex?” Haru questioned. “I’m his fucking brother!” he exclaimed.

“Really?” Sousuke asked rhetorically. “I never heard Rin talk about a brother. He only ever talked about his sister.”

“You’re just lying to me to piss me off,” Haru claimed. “Rin isn’t like that,” he said as he started toward the door.

“Well, maybe you just don’t know Rin as well as you think.”

Haru ignored the other man and went back into the cabin. He was just going to retreat to his bedroom until his anger subsided, but he was not looking where he was going and bumped into Makoto. Instead of panicking and running in the opposite direction like he might have done earlier, he pressed his forehead against Makoto’s chest and just stood there. It was only then that he could feel his body was shaking.

“Haru? Are you okay?” Makoto questioned.

Haru did not say anything; he just sighed shakily. Haru was still angry, but something about hearing Makoto’s voice made him feel just the slightest bit better.

“What happened, Haru?” Makoto tried again.

Haru remained silent.

“Is this about earlier?” Makoto asked.

Haru shook his head in response. “Yamazaki.”

“What about Sousuke?” Rin asked, surprising both Haru and Makoto. Neither of them noticed Rin walk into the room.

Haru stood up straight and glared at Rin. “It doesn’t matter,” he grumbled.

“What the fuck did I do?” Rin questioned.

“Guys please,” Makoto said, trying to keep the peace. “Can’t we just be happy that Rin’s back safe and sound?”

“Maybe you should go ask your boyfriend,” Haru growled, completely ignoring Makoto.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Rin snapped.

“Tell that to the hickies on your fucking collarbone,” Haru scoffed.

Rin’s cheeks flared up as he brought his hands up to cover his collarbone. Seeing Rin’s reaction, Haru got the confirmation he needed and left up the stairs to his bedroom.

Makoto followed Haru up the stairs. “Was that really necessary?” he asked.

Haru tried closing the door in Makoto’s face, but Makoto grabbed the door before it could shut. “Unless you want to come in here and fuck me,” Haru said. “You need to leave me the fuck alone.” His comment made Makoto let go of the door long enough for Haru to close and latch it. He knew he would have hell to pay in the morning, but he did not care. For now, he could be angry in peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so first things first, Sousuke is really played out as a dick in this chapter and I just want to tell you guys that Sousuke is NOT the bad guy. Haru and Sousuke don't get along in canon. I promise their relationship gets better.
> 
> Also, updates are slow af because I really don't know where to go with it. I mean, I know ow it's gonna end and I have a few major plot points, but if you guys have any ideas, please tell me. It would be extremely helpful and appreciated.
> 
> hmu on twitter or tumblr @bms408
> 
> P.S. In case you didn't already know, in the previous chapter end notes are the links to the bonus Sourin scene.


	9. Light Touches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’ve never felt like this before,” he said breathlessly. 
> 
> “Maybe that’s a good thing,”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look at this early update! It probably won't happen again but...

Haru lied in bed with his eyes shut but sleep completely away from him. In a way he was tired but at the same time he was wide awake. He had fallen asleep for an hour or so, but then woke up. He glanced over at the clock next to his bed and was able to make out it was some time past two in the morning. He wanted to believe he was the only one awake until he heard light knocking on his door.

“Haru, are you awake?” Haru could hear Makoto’s voice faintly through the door. “I just wanna talk.”

Haru did not really want to talk to Makoto, but he figured Makoto would probably be the easiest person to talk to right now. In addition, he would finally be able to talk to Makoto without some sort of interruption. Reluctantly, Haru got out of bed and went to the door. He undid the latch and slowly opened the door.

“What do you want?” Haru asked.

“I just want to talk to you,” Makoto replied.

Haru gestured for Makoto to come in and closed the door behind him, making sure to latch it again so no one else walked in. He walked back over to his bed and sat down, leaving Makoto standing awkwardly in the middle of the room.

After a few moments of silence, Makoto spoke. “Are you alright?” he asked.

“I’m fine,” Haru lied.

Makoto sat on the bed next to Haru. “I think you’re lying to me,” he said. He placed his hand on Haru’s thigh and locked eyes with him. “You can tell me anything. I won’t tell Rin a thing; I promise.”

“Aren’t you gonna ask about what happened with us earlier?” Haru questioned.

Makoto sighed. “I really don’t care about that right now,” he said. “What did Yamazaki do to you? And why did you come at Rin like that?”

The questions caught Haru by surprise. Of everything that had happened within the last twenty-four hours, **that** is what he wanted to talk about? Haru turned his head away from Makoto. “It doesn’t matter,” he mumbled.

“But it does matter,” Makoto stated.

Haru did not respond. He continued to look away from Makoto.

Makoto sighed again. “I get it,” he said. “You don’t trust me. I understand, but I just wanted to help.”

“I do trust you,” Haru admitted.

“Then why won’t you just tell me what’s bothering you? I know you want to talk to someone about it and the way you reacted earlier kinda makes me think you want to talk to me,” Makoto said.

Haru sighed in defeat. “He just doesn’t sit right with me,” he said.

“Yamazaki?”

“Yeah. There’s just something about him I don’t like, but that’s not the problem,” Haru’s voice got softer as the sentence finished. He paused for a moment, waiting for Makoto to say something and when he did not, Haru continued. “He said some… things about Rin. He told me I didn’t know Rin as well as I thought.” Another pause. “I started to believe him…”

“Why?” Makoto questioned. “Rin’s your brother.”

“Yeah, but…” Haru sighed. “He lied to me.”

“About what?”

“Yamazaki.”

Before Makoto could question him any further on the situation, Haru turned to look at Makoto again. His expression told Makoto that he really did not want to talk about this anymore.

Silence washed over the room. They just looked everywhere but the other’s face. Makoto still had his hand on Haru’s thigh and Haru made no attempt to get away from the touch. The two continued to sit in silence for about five minutes until Makoto spoke up to break it.

“Haru…” Makoto sighed. He turned his face away from Haru, but Haru could tell he was blushing. “That night I got drunk…”

_‘Oh great. Here we go again,’_ Haru thought to himself.

“When I was drunk… did I… did we…?” Makoto stuttered. It was obvious he was struggling to get the words out. “Haru, did we make out when I was drunk?” he finally asked.

Haru’s face flared up bright red. “W. what are you t. talking about? Y. you said you didn’t remember anything,” Haru replied.

“I thought it was a dream because I haven't been laid in a long ass time, but based on your reaction it wasn’t,” Makoto said. He groaned and put his face in his hands. “I’m so sorry Haru. For that night and earlier. No wonder you’ve been avoiding me.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Haru said without thinking. “I really enjoyed it; that’s why I’ve been avoiding you,” he added before Makoto could say anything.

“I. I don’t understand,” Makoto said.

“I’m gay and you’re hot,” Haru replied.

“But you told me you weren’t gay.”

“No, I said I wasn’t offended that you implied I was gay,” Haru corrected. “You told me that you weren’t gay.”

Makoto’s stature seemed to shrink. “I. I don’t think I am,” he admitted. “But, there’s just something about you that makes me feel… different.”

Haru couldn’t find the words to reply.

“I bet you think I’m some sort of creep. I mean, we barely know each other and I’m talking about this,” Makoto said.

“Makoto…” Haru said. He looked down at his knees. “Kiss me,” he added as he looked dead into Makoto’s eyes.

“W. What?”

Haru moved his face in closer to Makoto’s. “Kiss me,” he repeated.

Haru brushed his lips against Makoto’s. He was cautious, not truly knowing how Makoto was going to react. To his pleasant surprise, Makoto kissed him back harder. Haru wrapped his arms around Makoto’s neck and fell back onto the bed, dragging Makoto down with him. Haru pushed his tongue against Makoto’s lips and Makoto easily granted permission. The two sloppily kissed as if they had never kissed anyone before.

Haru pulled away and looked at Makoto’s shining green eyes. “I’ve never felt like this before,” he said breathlessly.

“Maybe that’s a good thing,” Makoto replied, pressing his lips against Haru’s again. “Because I feel the same way.”

* * *

Haru woke up without Makoto in the bed with him. He was almost sure that Makoto slept with him and Haru was starting to question if what happened earlier that morning only happened in his dreams. Part of him hoped it was all just a dream; there would be less to worry about.

Haru looked over at the clock and it was almost eleven in the morning. He didn’t remember what time he had fallen asleep. He could hear activity below him, telling him that people were awake. Chances were everyone was awake. He sat up and turned his attention out the window. He sighed, knowing all too well that sitting in his bed was not going to resolve any of his problems.

He made his way downstairs and to the kitchen where he saw Rin, Gou, and Yamazaki sitting at the table talking. Yamazaki did not seem as nasty toward Gou as he was to him; in fact, he was not unpleasant at all. All three of them were smiling and enjoying each other’s company. _Did Gou already know this guy?_

The happy moment did not last much longer after Rin made eye contact with Haru. Gou must have noticed Rin’s sudden tension and turned around to see Haru in the doorway. The look she gave him told Haru that she knew something. He did not know how much she knew, but she knew enough. She turned back around and looked at Yamazaki.

“Sousuke you should come with me,” she said, grabbing Yamazaki’s hand. “I really want to show you something while the sun’s still out.”

“But it’s not even noon,” Yamazaki replied. He looked over at Rin. It seemed like he was asking permission.

“Just go, Sousuke,” Rin said. “She’s as stubborn as I am. She won’t stop until she gets what she wants.”

Haru watched as Gou dragged Yamazaki out the back door, leaving just him and Rin in the kitchen. Haru was hoping Makoto would show up out of the blue, but his guess was Makoto set this whole thing up.

After a few minutes of silence, Rin was the first to speak. “I see you finally decided to stop hiding in bed,” he said.

“I wasn’t hiding,” Haru replied. “I was sleeping.”

“I’m not playing this game, Haru,” Rin said. “Why’d you come at me last night?”

“Well for one thing, you lied to me,” Haru answered.

“What did I lie to you about?”

“Recently?” Haru asked rhetorically. “Yamazaki.”

“What are you talking about?” Rin questioned.

“You could’ve just told me that he was your boyfriend,” Haru replied.

“I already told you he wasn’t!”

“You didn’t need to tell me because he did.”

Rin froze. “H. he did?”

“I’d get him a muzzle if I were you because that’s not the only thing he said,” Haru stated.

“Haru, let me explain what happened,” Rin said. “Please.”

Haru raised an eyebrow, signaling to Rin to explain.

Rin looked down at his feet and sighed. “He’s not my boyfriend,” he said. “He’s my ex. In fact… he’s the reason I left. I moved to Samezuka to be with him.” He paused for a moment to look up at Haru. “I didn’t want to tell you and Gou because I didn’t want you two to think low of me.”

“Why would we do that? Because you’re gay? So what?” Haru replied. “Do you know how many guys I slept with in college?”

“I thought it was pathetic that I fell for a guy so quickly,” Rin added. “That and… I really offended Mom. I’m surprised she didn’t expose me to you guys.”

“What happened with you and Mom?”

Rin looked down again and picked at his wrists. “It… it doesn’t matter. I just wish I had listened to her,” Rin said. Haru shot Rin a look expressing his confusion. Rin sighed and continued. “I met Sousuke on some dating app. Mom found out and told me not to trust someone I met on the internet. She didn’t agree with me dating him, so I moved out to Samezuka to live with him. We dated for two years… but I had to end it.” Rin paused a second. “He was my first boyfriend… he was my only boyfriend… I rushed into things and only got myself hurt.”

There was a brief moment of silence before Haru spoke. “Then why did you bring him here?” he asked.

“He took me in after we got separated in Samezuka,” Rin answered. “I just didn’t think I could leave him behind again. You don’t need to say anything; I already know I’m pathetic.”

“Rin…” Haru started, his voice small. “Yamazaki told me you never mentioned having a brother but you talked about Gou. Is that true?”

“Haru… please…”

“ **Is that true?** ” Haru repeated. His voice was no longer soft.

Rin took a moment to respond. “Yes… but-”

“Don’t,” Haru interrupted. “I don’t want to hear an excuse. I don’t care.”

“Yes you do,” Rin countered. “I never talked about you because I never felt guilty about leaving you behind.”

“What do you mean?” Haru asked.

“I only talked about Gou when I was going off about how guilty I felt leaving her behind,” Rin said. “But you, I knew you were strong enough to leave.” Rin sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “I’m a terrible brother.”

“Yeah, but I already knew that,” Haru said.

“Oi, shut it,” Rin said with a laugh. “You’re worse.”

* * *

The rest of the day was uneventful. Haru did his best to just avoid Yamazaki and Rin helped by disappearing with Yamazaki for periods of time. The only thing Haru wanted to do was talk to Makoto, or even just spend some time with him alone. Gou had been pestering him all day, wondering what had happened between him and Makoto. In a way it made Haru feel relieved that no one knew about what had happened.

It was not until nightfall that Haru was able to get Makoto alone. The two had managed to sneak outside and hide in the back seat of the car they took from Samezuka where they were heatedly making out. Haru had his back against the door as Makoto hovered over him. Makoto had full access to whatever he wanted and yet, he did not touch Haru.

“Haru…” Makoto sighed as he pulled away and sat up. “Aren’t you worried we’ll get caught?”

“I figured no one would come looking for us in the car,” Haru replied, also sitting up.

“That’s not necessarily what I meant,” Makoto said. Seeing Haru’s expression, he went on. “Don’t you think it would be suspicious to sneak around like this? Someone would easily catch on.”

“It won’t be suspicious if we only do this every once and a while,” Haru insisted.

Makoto sighed. “Is there something wrong, Haru?” Makoto asked. “I thought you had settled things with Rin already.”

“So you did tell them,” Haru accused. “You said you wouldn’t tell anyone.”

“I said I wouldn’t tell Rin,” Makoto said in defense. “Besides, I only told Gou because I needed her help getting you two alone.”

Haru did not reply. He turned his back to Makoto and looked out the window of the car.

“I’m sorry Haru,” Makoto sighed. “I thought if I helped you and Rin make up you wouldn’t have minded.”

“Just because we talked doesn’t mean anything’s better,” Haru mumbled.

“What do you mean?” Makoto questioned.

Haru did not say a word. He opened the door and started walking in the direction of the cabin.

“Haru wait,” Haru heard Makoto behind him but did not have time to turn around before Makoto grabbed his wrist.

“What did Rin do?” Makoto asked.

Haru let out a sigh of defeat. “Let’s just say, I felt better when he was lying to me,” he said. His voice was weak.

“Haru…”

“Now can you stop meddling in my business?” Haru exclaimed. “You’ll never understand what’s going on or how I feel!”

Makoto released his grip on Haru’s wrist, giving Haru all the freedom to go hide in his room again, yet he did not move. His back was still facing Makoto, but he could sense the man had not gone anywhere even though silence washed over them. All that could be heard was the crickets chirping in the grass.

Finally, Makoto spoke; his voice was soft. “That might be true… but I sure as hell can try,” he said.

“I… I don’t want you to do that,” Haru nearly whispered.

Haru felt Makoto get closer and wrap his arms loosely around his waist. The touch made his stomach flutter. He could not remember a time where he was consciously touched so gently by a man.

“Don’t do this to yourself, Haru…” Makoto said softly into Haru’s ear. “Your feelings matter. I know you might not believe it… but I care about your feelings… and so does Rin. You don’t need to go through your problems alone.”

“Why should anyone have to waste their time on me?”

Makoto sighed. “You are so selfless and I bet you don’t even know it,” he said. “Rin and Gou are your siblings and they love you and well… I just want to see you happy.”

Haru turned around, trying his best to not disturb Makoto’s arms because he enjoyed having them around him. He looked up at Makoto, who just offered him a soothing smile. Looking into Makoto’s green eyes at that moment made him feel okay. He felt as if no matter what happened next, he would make it through it in one piece.

Makoto leaned down and pressed a soft kiss against Haru’s lips; another action Haru was not too familiar with. It felt so calming to Haru and he could have stood there with Makoto forever.

“Everything is going to be alright,” Makoto promised.

Haru nodded. Maybe Makoto was right, and even if he was not, Haru believed he could get through anything as long as Makoto stood by his side.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've done so much sourin lately that I had to indulge myself and write an entire chapter around my otp
> 
> As always, I'm up for suggestions for future chapters


	10. Back in Samezuka

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before Yamazaki could respond, the pink-haired man noticed Makoto. “And who’s the hunky brunette you brought with you?” he asked as he released Yamazaki’s neck and walked over to Makoto, whose face was flushed bright red. “The name’s Kisumi, and you can do so any time you please,” he said with a wink.
> 
> Now Haru hated this man a thousand times more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for a chapter that's longer than average. I also changed up my formatting(again)
> 
> Before you read, just know there is some deep shit with self-inflicted sexual abuse in this chapter

Over a month had passed since Rin had returned to the cabin and it was about time for another stock up. However, what was more important to Haru was that it had been over a month and his “relationship” with Makoto still had not been figured out. Granted, they had been trying their best to keep it a secret, or at least Makoto had been, but it seemed like they were succeeding. Haru did not care if anyone found out. Rin and Gou already knew he was gay and those were the only other people he cared about.

It was decided that only three of the men would go back into the city to stock up at a time after everyone, save for Gou, insisted that she not go back unless absolutely necessary. This round it was Haru, Makoto and Yamazaki’s turn to go. Haru was not happy with the fact that he had to go with Yamazaki, but at least Makoto was also going. He sat in the backseat of Yamazaki’s old and busted pick-up truck while Makoto sat in the passenger seat. Makoto and Yamazaki were talking about something, but Haru did not care to listen. Instead, he stared out the window, taking in the sights of the unfamiliar areas of Samezuka. This was only his second time in Samezuka, so it only made sense that nothing looked familiar.

The group had a plan for how they were going to go about collecting what they needed. It was agreed upon that they would gather as much food and supplies they could before nightfall, spend the night in Samezuka, and then spend a few more hours gathering before heading back to the cabin. Their goal was to stock up enough that they would not have to go for another supply run until after the rainy season. Samezuka was hard enough to survive while the sun was out, and according to Yamazaki, it was even harder when it rained.

The first few stops the group had made had no incidents, but they all knew it would not be that easy. To cover more ground, the group split up; Yamazaki going solo and Makoto and Haru pairing up. Yamazaki insisted on going alone because he already knew the city. Haru could not say he was upset with that. He would much rather spend his time in Samezuka alone with Makoto.

The two had just finished looking for medical supplies in some no name drugstore when they encountered a group of Parasites. There was about seven of them only a few yards away. Haru knew they had enough ammunition to take all of them plus a handful extra, but upon seeing the fear in Makoto’s eyes, he was not quite sure he wanted to engage in a fight. However, Haru could not fulfill his decision when one noticed the men and came rushing toward them. Haru shot at the Parasite, resulting in the other six to turn their attention towards Haru and Makoto. Knowing that he could not shoot fast enough and Makoto would most likely not shoot at all, Haru dragged Makoto in the opposite direction and ran. They ran until Makoto dragged Haru into an alley and up a fire escape. They climbed up four levels and luckily the Parasites did not notice them.

“That was a close one,” Makoto said, trying to catch his breath.

Haru nodded. Haru looked down at the Parasites who had now moved their attention away from finding him and Makoto. A wave of sadness washed over him knowing that they were most likely just scared people only days, maybe even hours, before. Haru could not imagine how a family would feel having to see their loved one turn into these animals.

Haru was startled out of his thoughts by a hand on his shoulder. He whipped his head around to see Makoto looking out to where he was looking and then back at him.

“Are you alright, Haru?” Makoto asked.

“Did your family turn into them?” Haru replied with a question.

“What?”

“You told me your family got the virus… did they… did they become Parasites?” Haru added.

Makoto’s eyes grew wide and he pulled his hand back. He closed his eyes and sighed. “No,” he said. “At least… that’s what I was told. From what I know, they all just got too sick and were euthanized.” Haru could see the sadness in his eyes when he opened them.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you, I just-”

“I understand,” Makoto said. There was a pause before Makoto continued speaking. “It’s really depressing to see these people suffering like that. It makes you just want to shoot them all to put them out of their misery.”

Haru only nodded as a response. He knew that Makoto had a whole other view on the virus and what it does to people. He was not going to question how Makoto felt and why.

There was more silence between them as they stared out to the now empty street. As much as Haru wanted Makoto to talk to him, he did not dare bring anything up. Makoto needed time and he was willing to give him that.

 

Haru did not pay attention to how much time had passed before Makoto finally broke the silence. “We should probably go find Sousuke,” he said.

Haru agreed and they climbed down from the fire escape and made their way to the checkpoint they all agreed to meet at. As they were expecting, Yamazaki was already there, waiting impatiently. Makoto explained that they were chased and had to take cover and Yamazaki understood, at least Haru thinks he did. To Haru, Yamazaki just always looked angry.

“What kind of weapons do you guys have?” Yamazaki asked.

“All we have is what we brought with us,” Haru replied. After the outbreaks, Rin and Haru had only managed to get their hands on two pistols and a few melee weapons, which did not do much in their situation.

“Well, we’ll need more if there’s going to be six of us around,” Yamazaki said.

“And where do you suggest we get said weapons?” Haru questioned. It was not like he and Rin had not been looking for better weapons since the outbreaks. Weapons were nearly impossible to come by at this time.

“I know a guy,” Yamazaki answered.

Haru did not trust Yamazaki to begin with, but this only increased his suspicions towards him. He could not piece together how Rin would end up dating someone like him. However, Haru believed he had no other option but to let Yamazaki take him to “the guy”.

The group walked back to Yamazaki’s truck and drove off deeper into the city. Haru soon realized that the deeper into the city they got, the scarier the place seemed. Granted, Samezuka was never a place that received good reviews, but now it just seemed terrifying to live in. Haru had never visited Samezuka prior to the outbreaks, but he hoped it was never this bad. Haru could not even begin to imagine Rin living and working in this city. He did not believe Rin could survive a day, yet alone over two years.

 

After about a twenty-five minute drive, Yamazaki stopped the car in front of house with the windows boarded up. Haru already did not like the looks of this place considering the last time he walked into a building with boarded windows he had a gun pressed against his skull.

Yamazaki was the first out of the truck and walking toward the building with Makoto and Haru following behind him. Haru felt Makoto grab on to the base of his t-shirt as the got closer to the ominous building. Haru had almost forgotten that Makoto was with him and Rin back when they almost got shot.

Yamazaki did not hesitate walking into the house without knocking, leaving Haru and Makoto no choice but to follow. Immediately after entering the home, Yamazaki had two guns aimed at his head. “Relax, it’s just me,” he said simply and the men put their guns at their sides. “And guests,” he quickly added before the guns could be aimed at Haru and Makoto.

Haru took a quite glance around the house and came to the conclusion that it was one of those expensive, fancy houses that always looked good, even though it was in the middle of one of the shittiest cities around.

“Hey Boss!” one of the men called up the spiral staircase. “Your favorite is here.”

Within seconds after the announcement was made, a man started walking down the stairs. He wore nothing but a black silk robe with pink trim. His soft looking cotton candy pink hair bounced as he stepped. His pretty purple eyes were hidden beneath thick lashes. The man was drop dead gorgeous and yet, even with how gay he was, Haru’s face twisted in disgust. He felt angered that it was the end of the world and this man was living like a prince.

“Sousuke~” the man sang as he walked toward Yamazaki. “It’s been **so** long since your last visit.” The man wrapped his arms around Yamazaki’s neck and dragged him down into a deep kiss. Surprising to both Haru and Makoto however, was that Yamazaki seemed completely prepared for the action.

“I’ve missed you,” the man said after pulling away, but still keeping his arms around Yamazaki’s neck. “What’s the special occasion that has you showing up at my place without a call from me?”

Before Yamazaki could respond, the pink-haired man noticed Makoto. “And who’s the hunky brunette you brought with you?” he asked as he released Yamazaki’s neck and walked over to Makoto, whose face was flushed bright red. “The name’s Kisumi, and you can do so any time you please,” he said with a wink.

Now Haru hated this man a thousand times more.

It was only after a solid minute of flirting with Makoto (which Haru could tell was making him extremely uncomfortable) did Kisumi notice Haru. He glanced up and down Haru’s figure and turned back to Yamazaki. “Sousuke,” he said with nowhere near as much pep as he was speaking before. “You know I don’t fuck kids.”

Haru was about ready to beat the shit out of Kisumi when Yamazaki spoke. “Well then it’s a good thing I didn’t bring them here for a sex party,” he said.

“Oh?” Kisumi said, his flirting tone back in his voice. “Then why are you here?”

“I need weapons.”

“Is that so?” Kisumi asked as he walked over to a white sofa and sat down. “Because I’m almost positive I just gave you a year’s worth of supplies not that long ago.”

“I’m not asking for supplies, I’m asking for weapons,” Yamazaki corrected. He walked over and sat in the matching chair across from Kisumi.

“But weapons are included in supplies. You can’t honestly expect me to believe you’ve gone through a year’s supply of ammunition and bombs in three months, can you?”

“I’m not saying I went through it all. I just need more.”

“And why is that, Sousuke?” Kisumi asked. “If you’re truly having issues, like I offered a hundred times before, you could just stay here with me.”

“You know I won’t do that.”

“Are you really still hung up on him?” Kisumi questioned, his voice serious and offended. “He’s not coming back.”

“You’re wrong,” Yamazaki said.

Haru was able to piece together that they were talking about Rin.

“Sousuke, you need to move on. This is getting ridiculous,” Kisumi continued.

“I don’t care what I need to do anymore. It’s the end of the fucking world! We’re in the middle of an apocalypse! I just want to live my petty little life and you to live yours,” Yamazaki countered.

There was a brief moment of silence.

Kisumi sighed. “You’re lucky you’re my favorite,” he said with a flirty smile. “What do you need?”

“I need enough weapons for six and frankly baseball bats and iron plumbing pipes don’t really do the trick in our type of situation,” Yamazaki explained.

“So you want guns and bombs?”

“That’s preferable.”

“You might be my favorite, but I do have a business to run; a reputation to uphold. It’ll cost you,” Kisumi said.

“I know, and I’m willing to give you the proper payment. I’ll even cook you dinner on top of that,” Yamazaki agreed. “I know how much you love my cooking.”

Kisumi stood up and walked over to Yamazaki only to then throw himself into Yamazaki’s lap. “Don’t you know how to treat a businessman right,” he said and leaned down to kiss Yamazaki again.

* * *

Rin pushed his hair back in frustration, his sister giving him a glare she definitely picked up from Haru.

“I don’t get why you can’t just suck it up and get along with him,” Gou said.

“Since when is ignoring someone not getting along with them?” Rin questioned.

“Do you really think I don’t see the glares you give him?” Gou countered. “Seijuro is trying really hard to get your approval and you’re just being an ass about it. Haru doesn’t have a problem with him.”

“Yeah well, Haru has the emotions and morals of a rock.”

“No wonder Haru gets so damn angry with you,” Gou said. “You don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

“How am I only caring about myself if I’m worried about your safety?”

“I don’t need your protection from Seijuro,” Gou claimed

“Yes you do. I don’t know anything about that man. What if he wants to hurt you?”

“But I know he won’t! I’ve spent the past four years with him!”

The siblings’ argument, unfortunately for Rin, caught the attention of Mikoshiba.

“I’m sorry I want to be protective over my baby sister who’s dating a man that’s older than I am,” Rin said.

“I’m only a little over a year older than you,” Mikoshiba interjected. “Besides, how can you say you’re going to be protective over Gou when you haven’t been around in years?”

Rin could not find the words to respond.

“I was the one who was there for her after you left and I stayed through all this virus bullshit,” Mikoshiba continued.

“How do you expect me to trust a man that took advantage of my baby sister when she was going through a hard time?” Rin asked.

“I would never take advantage of her. I was there for her even when the going got rough. I didn’t run away from my problems like you did.”

“You don’t have any idea what I went through!” Rin exclaimed.

“And you have no idea what Gou’s been through!” Mikoshiba countered.

The two continued to bicker. Gou had made several attempts to get them to stop, but nothing was working. Both of the men ignored her, no matter what she said. The two had soon reached the point where they were only repeating the same few points over and over again.

Rin could hear that Gou was trying to get involved, but he did not care to really listen to what she had to say. He loved his sister, but that did not mean he could not be mad at her. He was furious at the fact that she would choose to be with a man like Mikoshiba. He was even angrier at the fact that she got engaged to him. Part of him knew that he did not have a right being mad because he did in fact leave, but at the same time, he could not help it. He has always been protective of his little sister and he was not going to stop now.

“I’m pregnant!”

Both the men did not stop their arguing until they heard the two words come from Gou. They went silent and looked at her nearly crying face.

“You’re pregnant?” the men questioned in unison; Mikoshiba’s response sounding significantly happier than Rin’s.

Gou only nodded in response, not making eye contact with either man.

Mikoshiba walked up to her with a smile. “That’s great,” he said, putting his hands on her shoulders so that she would look at him. He had completely let go of his feud with Rin and his anger had turned into happiness.

Rin, on the other hand, felt the exact opposite. This news only made him angrier and he stormed off to his room. He flopped himself down onto his bed and groaned. Why was this happening? It was not fair.

Rin wished he could go back in time. He would go back and stay with Haru and Gou, then Gou would never meet Mikoshiba and Haru would not hate him. Yet, Rin was not quite sure he would be willing to lose Sousuke. Maybe instead of running away, he would let them know about Sousuke. However, Rin knew that kind of thinking was stupid. There was no changing the past. All he could do now was make things better in the future, but frankly, he would rather live in the past.

 

_Rin’s phone lit up with a chime and he wasted no time responding to the text with smile on his face and butterflies in his stomach._

_“So, you’re really just going to move in with this guy?”_

_Rin looked up from his phone and across the table at his friend Nitori. Nitori was a year younger than him, but graduated in the same class as him and Haru because of skipping a year in elementary school. He met Nitori when he joined the swim team and he always looked up to Rin._

_“Yes,” Rin replied._

_Rin had invited Nitori out for coffee to tell him the news. He figured Nitori of all people would be on his side, but it was not looking that way._

_“Are you sure you want to do that?” Nitori asked. “I mean, you’ve haven’t even been dating a month yet. What about college?”_

_“You sound just like my mom. I’ll just go to school in Samezuka,” Rin said simply._

_“He lives in Samezuka? That’s hours away,” Nitori said in disbelief. “What about Haru and your sister? Do they know?”_

_“No, and I’d rather it stay that way.”_

_“But why? Don’t they deserve to know too?” Nitori questioned._

_“They don’t need to know that I’m dropping everything to be with my boyfriend,” Rin answered. “Besides… they don’t even know about him.”_

_Rin looked back down at his phone. ‘TWO MESSAGES FROM **Soubabe** ’ it blinked._

_‘Can’t wait to see u <3’_

_‘I’ll pick u up friday’_

_A small part of him did not want to go through with the move, but he was not going to back out now. With only the slightest degree of hesitation, Rin typed out his reply._

_‘I’ll be waiting <3’_

 

Rin opened his eyes and realized that hours had passed considering it was now dark outside. He did not know if he had fallen asleep or just blacked out, but whichever one it was did not matter. He was not angry anymore, in fact, he felt nothing at all.

As much as he wanted to deny it, Rin knew he wanted Sousuke there with him. Sousuke would take his side. Sousuke would wrap his arms around him, engulfing Rin in the scent that always made him relax. Sousuke would pull him close and pet his hair back. Sousuke would whisper to him that everything was going to be alright. Sousuke would litter the top of his head with kisses that would make him feel safe from everything.

Rin abruptly sat up, stopping his train of thoughts. He should not be thinking like that. He should not be seeking comfort in Sousuke; he should hate Sousuke. No matter how hard he tried to hate him, he always found himself wanting him back.

Rin felt defeated. He wanted Sousuke with him then and he would want Sousuke with him in the future. He did not want Sousuke to leave again, or rather, he did not want to leave Sousuke again.

Rin was defeated, but he was not willing to tell Sousuke that.

* * *

Haru could not say he was having the best night of his life. Being forced to stay with Yamazaki and his newly found enemy Kisumi, Haru could be nothing but angry. Not only did Haru not like either of them personally, he also did not like the fact that Yamazaki was flirting and such with Kisumi. Haru knew that Rin still had feelings for Yamazaki, even though Rin would deny it. He felt Yamazaki was playing with Rin’s emotions and taking advantage of his sensitive nature. Haru might have been mad that he left, but he loved Rin nonetheless. He did not want to see his brother get hurt all over again by this asshole.

In addition to the shit he was pulling with Yamazaki, Kisumi also spent a good portion of the night flirting with Makoto. Not only did it make Makoto uncomfortable, it made Haru want to slap a bitch; that bitch being Kisumi. Haru was about ready to expose his and Makoto’s secret when Yamazaki announced that they should get some sleep. After everything Haru had witnessed that night, he knew damn well Yamazaki and Kisumi were not going to be doing much sleeping.

Unfortunately for Haru, he was right.

Kisumi had put Haru and Makoto in different guest rooms. Haru’s room was the one right next to Kisumi’s room and all he could hear were Kisumi’s moans; most of which sounded beyond fake. Haru could not help but think that Kisumi was purposely making it so Haru (and quite possibly Makoto) could hear them, not that Haru cared. As long as Kisumi was not touching Makoto, he did not really care what he did.

It was not until Haru hear Kisumi call out Yamazaki’s name that he felt angry. He could not say he loved the fact that Yamazaki was fucking Kisumi. Sure, he despised Yamazaki, but Rin did not. Anyone with eyes could see that there was still something between them, and Haru’s positive Rin would not like this.

Deciding that he did not want to hear anymore of Kisumi’s moans, Haru left his room in search for Makoto’s.

Makoto’s room was only two rooms apart from Haru’s and did not take much effort to find. He lightly knocked on the door before opening it. Even if Makoto was already sleeping surely he would not mind if Haru slipped into bed with him. The two had not slept together since the night Rin came back to the cabin, but that would not matter to Makoto; at least, that is what Haru believed.

When Haru opened the door he saw Makoto lying in the bed facing the wall. Even though he had tried to make as little noise as possible, he seemed to have woken Makoto up.

“Haru?” Makoto asked in the darkness.

“I’m sorry if I woke you up,” Haru said.

“Don’t worry,” Makoto said, “I wasn’t sleeping. I just initially thought you were Kisumi and frankly I don’t like all the flirting.”

In the darkness Haru could still make out Makoto signaling for him to come, so he did. He closed the door and walked over to the bed and sat next to a now sitting up Makoto. Luckily for both of them, Kisumi could not be heard in this room.

“I didn’t like it either,” Haru said.

“I bet,” Makoto said with a light-hearted laugh. “Though, I can’t say I can see you as the jealous type.”

“I’m not,” Haru insisted, “but he was making you uncomfortable, so I didn’t like it.”

Makoto leaned over and pressed his lips against Haru’s temple. “I appreciate that,” he said, and Haru could practically feel his smile.

There was a brief moment of silence before Haru spoke. “Are you tired?” he asked.

“Not necessarily,” Makoto answered.

“Good,” Haru replied. He moved closer to Makoto and sat in his lap. “I want some alone time with you,” he said as he wrapped his arms around Makoto’s neck.

Before Makoto had the time to object in any way, Haru’s lips were pressed against his. It took a moment, but eventually Makoto was kissing him back.

As much as Haru enjoyed kissing Makoto, he wanted to be more intimate. In the month that they had been sneaking around Makoto had barely touched him, and when he did, it was far from inappropriate. The most intimate they had gotten was when Makoto was drunk. Granted, Haru had never had a real relationship before, but he has had sex lots of times. Maybe Makoto was not attracted to him, or maybe was only doing all of this to be nice.

Haru decided to experiment. He moved his lips away from Makoto’s and moved them down to his neck. He began to kiss and lightly suck on the skin, which he found surprisingly sensitive.

“Haru…” Makoto sighed.

_So he was enjoying that._

Haru then decided to take things another step forward. As he moved his lips down Makoto’s neck to his collar bone, he brushed his hands under Makoto’s shirt and up his stomach; a stomach that was very much toned he might add. Before his fingers could get any higher however, Makoto grabbed his wrists to stop him.

“Haru, please stop,” Makoto said.

_Damn it._

Makoto let go of Haru’s wrists and sighed. “Does this relationship mean anything to you?” he asked.

“What do you mean?” Haru replied as he stood up.

“I kinda feel as if you’re only looking for sex from me,” Makoto said.

“What else is there to a relationship? Especially now. It’s not like we can go on romantic dates and shit,” Haru said

Makoto went silent for a moment. “I’m not the kind of person who’ll just sell themselves for sex. I honestly don’t understand how someone could do that to themselves,” he said.

Haru turned his head to the side. “It’s not that hard,” he mumbled, almost immediately regretting it.

“Haru…”

“Just forget about it,” Haru said as he walked toward the door to leave.

“Haru don’t go!” Makoto called out. “I’m sorry.”

Haru stopped and sighed. He turned around and looked at Makoto in the darkness (his eyes were now well adjusted to the dark) but did not say anything.

“Haru… I-”

“Are you not attracted to me?” Haru asked before letting Makoto finish his statement.

“What does that have to do with what we were talking about?” Makoto questioned.

“Why don’t you want to have sex with me?” Haru continued. He might as well get it all over with at once; get all the answers he needs.

“Haru stop.”

“Why will you not answer me?”

Makoto sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “It’s not that I’m not attracted to you or don’t want to have sex with you, it’s just…” he paused as if he was trying to figure out what to say. “I’ve never been with another man and don’t even have the slightest idea on how to go about doing it.”  Makoto turned his head so that Haru could not see his face directly. “Plus, I’d want to spoil you, Haru, and doing it in some stranger’s guest room doesn’t really make the mood for me.”

Haru walked back over to the bed and sat next to Makoto, their thighs pressed against each other’s. “I don’t want to be spoiled,” he said practically in a whisper. “I don’t deserve it.”

“Haru, I don’t care about the past,” Makoto said, knowing that that is why Haru believed he did not deserve to be spoiled.

“Do you know how many men I let just use me to get off?” Haru asked.

“That doesn’t matter to me,” Makoto insisted.

“I enjoyed the abuse,” Haru admitted as he looked down at his hands in his lap. “I would let them do whatever they wanted to me. They would make me cry and choke and bleed, but I always went back to seek out more. They would tie me up and beat me; leave bruises and bite marks; defile me in public; but I always went back to the same bar with the same men who would do it over and over.”

Haru looked back up at Makoto’s face. His expression looked something like a mix of shock and sadness and Haru swore he could see tears welling in his eyes.

“Why would you do that?” Makoto asked but immediately covered his mouth as if he did not want to ask out loud.

Haru sighed. “Because it made me feel wanted for a change; like I wasn’t a nuisance.” Haru looked at Makoto for a reply, but when he did not give one, he continued. “Even though Rin’s mom adopted me, I never felt like I belonged. I felt like an outcast. I was thirteen years old, and so was Rin. I had no right entering that family. I avoided any kind of celebration that involved family, I would stay out of the house as much as possible, I did my best to make so that it was like I wasn’t there at all, yet I still felt like a nuisance. I felt like people only acted like they enjoyed having me around because I was the sad kid that’s parents died…” He paused. “When Rin left, I didn’t know what to do, and well, you know the rest.”

When Haru looked up at Makoto’s face, this time he could see the tears rolling down his cheeks.

Makoto did not say anything, rather he pulled Haru into a tight hug. Haru could feel that Makoto was trembling and he felt himself break. He did not cry, but he did hug Makoto back just as tight. He buried his face in the crook of Makoto’s neck, finding himself relaxed in his scent (even though Makoto currently smelled like sweat and dirt).

“Haru, you don’t need to do that anymore,” Makoto said in an almost motherly tone. “No matter what happens or who we encounter, I’ll want you around.”

Haru did not say anything in response, but he knew he did not need to. He knew Makoto would just sit there with his arms around him until he was ready to be let go. Makoto would spoil him, and for the first time in over a decade, Haru was content with being spoiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the Soukisu shit, but i promise it'll only be in it until after the next chapter
> 
> hmu on twitter and tumblr @bms408 if you want to yell at me


	11. Two Wrongs Make a Right

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin stepped in front of Sousuke, who was now leaning against the side of the truck, and moved his hand away from his face to reveal Sousuke’s tears. Rin brushed his thumbs under Sousuke’s eyes to wipe away the tears.
> 
> “Come on, don’t do that,” Rin said softly, his hands still resting on Sousuke’s cheeks. “You know I hate seeing cry even more than you hate seeing me do it.”
> 
> Silence washed over the pair as they just looked at each other. Looking in to Sousuke’s red-rimmed eyes, Rin realized that he was holding the face of the man he had fallen in love with five years ago and that that man had never actually left. He could no longer deny that he wanted to be with Sousuke again. And now, Rin felt he could tell Sousuke that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to start off by saying I'm sorry this took so long. I was doing so well with updating once a month and then I ruined it. In all honesty, college took up a lot more of my time than I initially thought and back in September I found out some really bad news that just destroyed me mentally. I've been so tired and stressed lately that I just never felt like working on things. But don't worry. I will finish this fic. The ending I have planned is too good to not finish.

* * *

Haru awoke the following morning with his limbs feeling heavy. The malnutrition he had brought upon himself in the last year was catching up to him and he was really beginning to feel its wrath.

He sat up and noticed Makoto’s arm resting across his lap. Makoto was lying on his stomach with his face toward Haru. Makoto’s sleeping face made Haru feel a little giddy. Seeing Makoto sleeping was probably one of his favorite things. Memories of the night before rushed into his mind. There was no sex, only sweet kisses and long embraces, but to Haru, that was a completely different experience. It was far more intimate than anything Haru had done before with anyone.

Looking down at Makoto made Haru question how Makoto could be as good as he is. He had been dealt one of the shittiest hands Haru had ever seen, yet he still gives and he still cares. He still puts others first and sees the best in people, even if there is not really anything there to see.

Haru wanted to curl back up with his head resting on Makoto’s shoulder, but his bladder had other plans. Begrudgingly, Haru forced himself out of bed and to the bathroom.

Stepping out of the bathroom, Haru heard the voices of Yamazaki and Kisumi coming from the floor below him. His original plan was to just ignore them and go back to his room to curl up in Makoto’s arms. However, once he heard Rin’s name come from Kisumi’s mouth, curiosity got the best of him and he found himself slowly sneaking down the stairs. He stood outside the kitchen doorway listening to the conversation, or rather, the argument.

“It’s always about Rin,” Kisumi said. “Rin this and Rin that. What about me?”

“You knew what you were getting in to,” Yamazaki replied.

“Did I? Did I really Sousuke?” Kisumi questioned. “When you asked me out, I in no way thought it would be like high school. I thought I meant something to you, but no, it was only ever Rin. Even after he dumped your sorry ass you still refused to get over him. Even now, years later.”

Yamazaki mumbled something that Haru could not make out, but Kisumi certainly could.

“What?” Kisumi exclaimed in disbelief. “And he just got back together with you?”

“That’s not what I said,” Yamazaki replied. “But… it is something I’m reaching for.”

Haru was then easily able to conclude that Yamazaki was still talking about Rin. It was most likely about Rin coming back.

“So you’re just going to give him a second chance after he treated you like dirt?” Kisumi questioned.

There was a pause.

“Sousuke… I don’t want to see you get hurt aga-”

“Will you stop?” Yamazaki exclaimed followed by the sound of shuffling that Haru could only guess was Yamazaki pushing Kisumi away. “Stay out of my business. There is nothing between us. There **was** nothing between us. It was only sex. Period.”

A deafening silence seemed to wash over the entire house. Even Haru felt Kisumi’s shock and it seemed like Yamazaki was not going to make a move to apologize.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, Kisumi spoke. His voice was no longer peppy and confident, but rather soft and lifeless. “Have one of my men load your truck and when your ‘friends’ wake up, get your ass out of here. You can get another restock in a year, but next time, just send the brunette and his boyfriend.” There was no anger in his voice. In fact, it sounded neutral and businesslike.

“Understood,” Yamazaki replied as if he had not just ripped a man’s heart out and destroyed it.

Kisumi sighed. “I hope he’s really worth it, Sousuke. Don’t fall into the same trap twice like I did.”

Kisumi walked out of the kitchen and up the staircase without noticing Haru standing beside the doorway. In the quick glance that Haru got of the other man’s face he could tell he was on the verge of tears. Haru had to give him props on how well he was holding himself together after what he had just heard. Moments later, Haru heard a door inside the kitchen open and shut. He peaked in and saw that Yamazaki had stepped out into the back yard, most likely to smoke.

Even though Haru was not a big fan of Kisumi, he still felt angry towards Yamazaki’s words. What if Yamazaki ever said something like that to Rin? Rin is already so sensitive to things. Haru could not even begin to imagine how it would hurt Rin. However, instead of starting another fight with Yamazaki, Haru silently made his way back to his bed where Makoto lie before he could wake up.

 

Within the hour, the group packed up and left Kisumi’s place without saying any sort of goodbye. Haru had not seen Kisumi since he stormed out of the kitchen and he could not blame him for wanting to stay hidden. Haru could only imagine how painful it would feel hearing those words from someone you loved; not that he has ever loved anyone before.

They made their way back to the cabin, only stopping on two occasions to grab extra food and medical supplies. The ride was generally silent; Makoto most likely picking up on the unspoken tension between Haru and Yamazaki.

When they arrived back at the cabin, Rin met them at the truck almost immediately, as if he had been waiting for their return. Haru and Makoto started carrying in food and Rin insisted that he and Yamazaki would get the rest.

Haru walked around and went in through the back door; Makoto not far behind. The two began putting the food in its appropriate place in the kitchen in silence.

“Hey Haru,” Makoto said, breaking said silence.

“Hm?” Haru responded.

“Did you and Sousuke get into another fight? That car ride felt pretty heavy,” Makoto asked.

Haru was actually fairly surprised it had taken Makoto this long to say anything considering almost nothing had been said the whole day.

“No,” Haru answered in all honesty. He did not fight with Yamazaki, even though he did want to. Kisumi on the other hand…

Makoto gave Haru a questioning look that said he did not believe him.

“I didn’t,” Haru said.

Makoto nodded and Haru was still not quite sure he believed him.

There was more silence between the two as they finished packing everything away. Once they were done, Haru put the kettle on for tea.

“I’m sorry about last night, Haru,” Makoto said seemingly out of nowhere.

“Why?” Haru questioned, turning around to face Makoto.

“Because…” Makoto started, eyes avoiding Haru’s. “You just wanted to have sex, which is fairly reasonable, but I backed out and then all that stuff I made you say… I just… I’m sorry.”

“Makoto…” Haru sighed. “First of all, you did not make me say anything. I wanted you to know.” He walked toward Makoto and put his hands on Makoto’s shoulders. “And what you gave me last night was the best thing any man has ever given me.” He stood up on his toes to press a chaste kiss on Makoto’s lips.

“I don’t think I understand,” Makoto mumbled against Haru’s lips.

“I’ve never been in a real relationship, but with you, I think I can work this one out. Don’t feel so bad when I mess things up and you need to correct me. I want this to work, so if I need to slow down for your sake, I am more than willing.”

“Thanks Haru,” Makoto said with a smile and stole a kiss before the kettle started screeching.

* * *

 Rin watched as Makoto and Haru walked away toward the back of the cabin. Once they were out of sight, he moved closer to Sousuke, leaning up against the side of the truck. He watched Sousuke as he pulled two duffle bags out from the backseat of the truck and put them on the ground.

“You seemed excited to see me,” Sousuke said, a hint of playfulness in his voice.

Rin did not respond.

“What’s the matter, Rin?” Sousuke asked.

“What makes you think something is wrong?”

“You’re pouting,” Sousuke replied.

“I am not pouting,” Rin countered.

“Okay,” Sousuke said, “then why did you insist your friends leave? You must want me alone for something.”

Rin did not respond again.

“Babe, you gotta tell me what’s wrong or else I can’t help you.”

Rin remained silent and turned his head away from Sousuke.

Sousuke sighed and, instead of questioning Rin any further, returned to unpacking the truck. He lifted a box of what looked like ammunition out of the cargo bed of the truck with a pained intake of air through his teeth. He quickly put the box down and brought his hand up to grasp his shoulder.

“Your shoulder still hurts…?” Rin asked upon noticing Sousuke’s struggle.

“I’m fine,” Sousuke insisted.

“We have something you can take to help,” Rin offered.

“No!” Sousuke exclaimed, startling Rin. “I refuse to take any pain meds.”

“But you’re in pain,” Rin argued.

“I got clean. I don’t want to relapse again. I can’t relapse again,” Sousuke said. “Not in front of you. You’re the reason I got clean in the first place.”

“You won’t relapse,” Rin said. “You can’t get addicted to ibuprofen.”

“I haven’t taken a pain med in almost three years. I’m not going to start now. I can’t do that to you again.” Sousuke brought a hand up to cover his face.

Rin stepped in front of Sousuke, who was now leaning against the side of the truck, and moved his hand away from his face to reveal Sousuke’s tears. Rin brushed his thumbs under Sousuke’s eyes to wipe away the tears.

“Come on, don’t do that,” Rin said softly, his hands still resting on Sousuke’s cheeks. “You know I hate seeing cry even more than you hate seeing me do it.”

Silence washed over the pair as they just looked at each other. Looking in to Sousuke’s red-rimmed eyes, Rin realized that he was holding the face of the man he had fallen in love with five years ago and that that man had never actually left. He could no longer deny that he wanted to be with Sousuke again. And now, Rin felt he could tell Sousuke that.

Rin pulled Sousuke’s face down to press a soft kiss to his lips. As he pulled away however, he could smell a perfume on Sousuke; one that he was almost sure he knew who it belonged to. He pulled back shocked and heart-broken in a sense, leaving Sousuke confused.

“What’s wrong?” Sousuke questioned.

“You were with him…” Rin mumbled so it was barely audible.

“What?”

“You were with **him** …” Rin repeated, louder this time. He pulled down Sousuke’s scarf to reveal his neck nearly covered in hickies. “You were with Kisumi again!”

“Rin, let me explain,” Sousuke said.

“I should have known,” Rin sighed.

“I only did what I had to in order to get more weapons for everyone,” Sousuke claimed.

“I can’t believe you.”

“You know how Kisumi is…” Sousuke tried saying in his defense.

“Then why would you even go to him?” Rin accused.

“Why does it matter? You’ve told me a hundred times you don’t want to date me. It shouldn’t matter to you who I sleep with,” Sousuke countered.

“To you it wouldn’t have mattered if we were dating or not,” Rin said. “You still would have done it. You’ve done it before.”

In mere seconds, Sousuke flipped their previous positions so that it was now Rin pinned to the side of the truck. Rin felt himself sink under Sousuke’s looming shadow.

“I may have been a lot of shitty things while we were dating,” Sousuke said, “but I was **never** a cheater.”

Sousuke backed away from the truck and grabbed the two duffle bags from the ground and Rin watched as he headed towards the back of the cabin.

After the initial shock of Sousuke’s anger had faded, Rin fell to his knees and began to sob. One thing was certain: he was really good at fucking things up.

 

After a few hours and rants to Haru and Makoto later, Rin’s anger had settled down. He did not know exactly what time it was, but he knew it was some time past nine at night. He had not seen Sousuke since their argument and him and Gou would barely glance at each other when they were in the same room.

He felt terrible.

He was being a dick to everyone who cared about him and it was wrong. He was being so selfish. Just because he was an emotional wreck doesn’t mean everyone around him needs to suffer.

He needed to apologize to Gou, but he knew there was someone else who deserved an apology first. He could apologize to Gou in the morning.

Rin walked upstairs and stood outside the room that he and Sousuke shared. Sousuke had been hiding in said room since he had finished bringing in the supplies he had brought back from Samezuka. Rin knew he was being avoided, but he could not really say he was surprised.

With slight hesitation, Rin opened the door and entered the room, closing the door behind him. Sousuke was sitting by the open window with a cigarette between his fingers gazing out at the never ending field. Considering how long he had been up here, Rin did not even want to guess how much he had already smoked.

“I’m sorry,” Sousuke said, his eyes still focused out the window. “I know you don’t like the smell.”

“You’ve been avoiding me,” Rin stated.

“I can’t really avoid you here,” Sousuke said. “I just stayed out of your way. You knew where you could find me.” Sousuke’s tone told Rin he was still very angry.

“You’re mad at me.”

“No fucking shit,” Sousuke replied hastily.

Rin sighed. “ And you have every right to be,” he said as dropped himself onto the bed. “I’ve been such a dick to you and you don’t deserve that.” Rin paused for a moment, low-key hoping Sousuke would respond, or even look at him, in some way. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want your apology,” Sousuke said. He still had not looked at Rin.

Rin sighed again. “I’m sorry for everything, Sousuke,” Rin mumbled. “From now to all the way back to when we dated.”

Finally, Sousuke turned to look at Rin, his eyebrow raised in interest.

“I always thought you were lying to me when you said you were in pain. I had seen so many people overdose that I couldn’t save. I got so scared that would become you.” Rin bowed his head as tears dripped from his face and onto his thighs. “I didn’t want to sit in the back of an ambulance with you again. I got so caught up in my unrealistic nightmares that I couldn’t even see how much pain you were in and now you’re still in a lot of pain and it’s all my fault. If you’re in pain even now, I can’t even begin to imagine how much it hurt years ago. I’m so sorry Sousuke. I’m so, so sorry.”

There was a long period of silence with the occasional sniffle from Rin crying into his hands.

Rin felt the bed sink next to him, but before he could look up, Sousuke had his arms around his shoulders.

Sousuke rested Rin’s head on his chest and sighed. “You cry too easily,” he said as he ran his fingers through Rin’s hair.

“Sousuke stop,” Rin said as he pushed Sousuke away. “You’re supposed to be mad at me.”

“Rin, I was mad at you for years,” Sousuke admitted. “I’m tired of being mad.” Sousuke grabbed Rin’s hand ran his thumb over his knuckles. “I had no idea that was how you felt. You should have just told me.”

“I know,” Rin sighed. “I don’t know why I didn’t.”

“I never deserved someone as caring as you,” Sousuke sighed.

“I never deserved someone as forgiving as you,” Rin added.

“Well, you know what they say, two wrongs make a right,” Sousuke said with a slight chuckle.

There was more silence between them, except the tension that was there before was gone.

“Sousuke…” Rin said, getting Sousuke’s attention. “Does this mean we’re dating again?”

“No.”

“Do you still want to date me again?” Rin asked.

“I do,” Sousuke replied. “But not right now. We need time for this to work again.”

“I understand. Let’s just go to bed then. I’m emotionally exhausted.”

“As you wish.”

* * *

Haru and Makoto were sitting at the table in the kitchen with Makoto talking about a time when his siblings were younger when Gou and Seijuro came in through the back door, surprising both of them.

“Where have you two been?” Makoto asked. “We’ve barely seen either of you since we came back.”

“Gou’s been hiding from Rin,” Seijuro responded.

“No I haven’t,” Gou argued. “It’s just, we got into an argument and I needed some space away from him.” Haru could tell that she wanted to pull at her hair like she used to do when she was upset, but could not because it was no longer long enough.

“From what we heard, it sounded more like Rin and Seijuro got into an argument,” Haru stated.

“Rin told you…” Gou said with anxiousness in her voice.

Haru nodded.

“Congratulations,” Makoto chimed in.

“A. are you upset about it too?” Gou asked in the direction of Haru.

“No,” Haru answered. “Why would I be?”

“It’s just,” Gou started as she tried grabbing for her hair again. “Rin got so upset about it. We haven’t even spoken since he found out.”

“Rin is just… Rin,” Haru sighed. “He doesn’t think like everyone else does.” Haru looked up at the couple. “Kou, as long as you’re happy, I’m happy. As long as that man still loves you, it doesn’t matter to me, and if he ever stops loving you, I’ll kick his sorry ass out to fend for himself.”

Even though Haru’s words did not come out the way he had wanted, he could see the relief wash over both Gou and Seijuro’s faces.

“So, if you don’t mind me asking, how far along are you?” Makoto asked.

“Oh uh, probably a little over three months,” Gou replied.

“Three months?” Haru questioned because from what he saw, she did not look pregnant at all. “And you just now decided to tell us?”

“I just wanted to be ultra-sure I actually was pregnant before I got anyone’s hopes up,” Gou said.

“I could’ve confirmed it for you when we first met,” Makoto said with a laugh.

“What do you mean?” Gou asked.

“Well… I don’t know. You just looked pregnant. You know, that glow they always talk about,” Makoto said.

Haru felt relieved when he saw that Seijuro looked just as confused as he was.

“Well, I guess anyone could confuse that with your glowing personality,” Makoto said with a chuckle upon seeing the confusion in the other men’s faces.

“Aww, Haru he’s so nice,” Gou said in regards to Makoto’s comment. “How did you ever become friends with him?” Gou shrugged off her coat, handed it to Seijuro, and sat in the chair next to Makoto. Doing so, she noticed under the table where Haru’s fingers were intertwined with Makoto’s. She gave Haru a little smirk before she continued to speak. “You see, Haru and Rin have always been such jerks so all their friends have been jerks…”

Haru did not listen to the story she was telling Makoto, but he was happy to see the two getting along. She knew about the relationship, but of course Haru knew that she would find out in no time. She had probably already known and this just confirmed it, but he was okay with that. She already knew about his feelings for him and he knew she would not tell.

He felt content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still taking suggestions for future chapters. Honestly, if you want it to happen, it probably will. I have so many gaps I need to fill.


End file.
